1
00:00:29,964 --> 00:00:32,499
<i>My name is Sebastian.</i>
<i>And, yeah, that's me.</i>

2
00:00:32,532 --> 00:00:35,336
<i>When my mother used</i>
<i>to dress me for pre-school,</i>

3
00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:38,239
<i>like I was going to Studio 54.</i>

4
00:00:38,272 --> 00:00:42,509
<i>Like most American stories,</i>
<i>mine starts a long time ago</i>

5
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:43,911
<i>on another continent.</i>

6
00:00:44,844 --> 00:00:49,482
<i>Specifically,</i>
<i>the magical island of Sicilia.</i>

7
00:00:49,816 --> 00:00:50,918
(BLEATING)

8
00:00:50,952 --> 00:00:52,519
SEBASTIAN: <i>A lot of folks</i>
<i>like to call Sicily</i>

9
00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:55,089
<i>the big ball in front</i>
<i>of the boot of Italy,</i>

10
00:00:55,122 --> 00:00:56,424
<i>which makes sense</i>

11
00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:57,857
<i>'cause the world's been</i>
<i>trying to kick our ass</i>

12
00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,927
<i>since the dawn of time.</i>
(ELEPHANT TRUMPETS)

13
00:00:59,961 --> 00:01:01,494
(WHIP CRACKS)
(WOMAN SCREAMING)

14
00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:03,463
SEBASTIAN: <i>For generations,</i>
<i>my people have been</i>

15
00:01:03,496 --> 00:01:05,832
<i>threatened by wars,</i>

16
00:01:05,865 --> 00:01:07,234
<i>volcanoes,</i>

17
00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:10,237
<i>and testicle-crushing Speedos.</i>

18
00:01:10,271 --> 00:01:11,305
(GOAT BLEATING)

19
00:01:11,339 --> 00:01:12,772
<i>But we survived it all</i>

20
00:01:12,806 --> 00:01:15,675
<i>through one unstoppable force.</i>

21
00:01:16,077 --> 00:01:17,544
<i>Family.</i>

22
00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:22,383
<i>These are actual photos</i>
<i>of my Sicilian ancestors.</i>

23
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:25,152
<i>Note the signature</i>
<i>Maniscalco look.</i>

24
00:01:25,186 --> 00:01:29,423
<i>With the curved spines</i>
<i>and the resting bitch face,</i>

25
00:01:29,457 --> 00:01:32,726
<i>like a bunch</i>
<i>of pissed-off candy canes.</i>

26
00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:35,062
<i>Over the past few centuries,</i>

27
00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:40,301
<i>these proud hunchback men</i>
<i>have operated with one goal.</i>

28
00:01:40,334 --> 00:01:41,534
<i>Do everything you can...</i>
(COW MOOS)

29
00:01:41,568 --> 00:01:43,337
<i>...to give your kids</i>
<i>a better life</i>

30
00:01:43,371 --> 00:01:45,006
<i>than the one you had.</i>

31
00:01:45,039 --> 00:01:47,308
<i>For my father,</i>
<i>this meant leaving</i>

32
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,709
<i>his beloved Sicily</i>
<i>for Chicago.</i>

33
00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:52,213
<i>So he and my mother could</i>
<i>give me opportunities</i>

34
00:01:52,246 --> 00:01:53,280
<i>they never got.</i>

35
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:55,548
<i>Like shoveling snow.</i>

36
00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:58,752
<i>Growing a beautiful mullet.</i>

37
00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,121
<i>And going to the prom</i>

38
00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:01,989
<i>looking like a pit boss.</i>
(SLOT MACHINE CHIMING)

39
00:02:02,023 --> 00:02:03,190
(MAN WHISTLING)

40
00:02:03,224 --> 00:02:05,359
SEBASTIAN: <i>Growing up,</i>
<i>my father busted his hump</i>

41
00:02:05,393 --> 00:02:07,361
<i>to instill in me certain rules</i>

42
00:02:07,395 --> 00:02:09,863
<i>of how a man should operate.</i>

43
00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:13,367
<i>Like, if you're awake,</i>
<i>you should be workin'.</i>

44
00:02:13,401 --> 00:02:15,002
Hey, how's
the pressure,
Mrs. Marinelli?

45
00:02:15,036 --> 00:02:16,303
Harder.

46
00:02:16,337 --> 00:02:17,938
You got to get in there, son.
I don't pay you by the hour,

47
00:02:17,972 --> 00:02:19,572
I pay you
by the moan, capisce?

48
00:02:19,606 --> 00:02:21,976
(MOANING)

49
00:02:22,009 --> 00:02:23,576
SEBASTIAN: <i>Guy</i>
<i>with the ponytail,</i>

50
00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:25,146
<i>that's my dad.</i>
(MOANING CONTINUES)

51
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:27,248
<i>Did I mention he owns a salon?</i>

52
00:02:27,281 --> 00:02:30,850
<i>The man comes from a long line</i>
<i>of Sicilian hairstylists.</i>

53
00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:32,987
<i>And don't you dare</i>
<i>call him a barber.</i>

54
00:02:33,020 --> 00:02:35,456
<i>This man doesn't</i>
<i>just cut hair,</i>

55
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,824
<i>he creates styles.</i>

56
00:02:37,857 --> 00:02:39,592
Salvo,

57
00:02:39,626 --> 00:02:40,894
it's beautiful.

58
00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:42,896
See? I told you
you had cheekbones
under there.

59
00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:45,299
You just needed
Michelangelo
to dig them out.

60
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:48,302
SEBASTIAN: <i>Child labor laws</i>
<i>were definitely broken.</i>

61
00:02:48,335 --> 00:02:49,537
<i>But on the bright side,</i>

62
00:02:49,569 --> 00:02:52,339
<i>I had the most realistic</i>
<i>Chewbacca costume</i>

63
00:02:52,373 --> 00:02:54,208
<i>in the history of Halloween.</i>

64
00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:56,243
(MIMICS CHEWBACCA'S GROWL)

65
00:02:56,277 --> 00:02:59,146
SEBASTIAN: <i>He taught me</i>
<i>to always save your money.</i>

66
00:02:59,180 --> 00:03:00,580
No apps, no dessert.

67
00:03:00,613 --> 00:03:01,848
And if you don't
finish your main,

68
00:03:01,881 --> 00:03:03,918
you're paying
for your own
birthday dinner.

69
00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:09,557
SEBASTIAN:
<i>And to be resourceful.</i>

70
00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:10,890
You wanted me
to buy you
a skateboard,

71
00:03:10,925 --> 00:03:12,659
I built you
one instead.

72
00:03:14,061 --> 00:03:15,296
Next year,
I'm gonna
build you

73
00:03:15,329 --> 00:03:17,131
one of those
Nintendos.

74
00:03:17,164 --> 00:03:19,467
SEBASTIAN:
<i>But one exception, cologne.</i>

75
00:03:19,500 --> 00:03:23,270
<i>Never cheap out</i>
<i>on your signature scent.</i>

76
00:03:23,304 --> 00:03:27,141
<i>At bedtime, our house smelled</i>
<i>like an Uber in Las Vegas.</i>

77
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:32,779
<i>The only time I saw</i>
<i>my father smile is</i>

78
00:03:32,812 --> 00:03:34,215
<i>when we did</i>
<i>the chicken dance</i>

79
00:03:34,248 --> 00:03:35,282
<i>for my mother.</i>

80
00:03:37,684 --> 00:03:40,221
<i>To me, this man was a God.</i>

81
00:03:41,589 --> 00:03:43,756
<i>And it was all</i>
<i>working out great</i>

82
00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:45,426
<i>until I grew up,</i>

83
00:03:45,459 --> 00:03:49,762
<i>and fell for someone</i>
<i>who was my complete opposite.</i>

84
00:03:49,796 --> 00:03:52,632
<i>Her name was Ellie.</i>

85
00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,635
<i>I mean, look at this girl.</i>

86
00:03:55,668 --> 00:04:00,007
<i>The style, the positivity,</i>

87
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,875
<i>personality.</i>

88
00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:05,012
<i>Yeah, this was my dream woman.</i>

89
00:04:08,315 --> 00:04:09,649
Sebastian!

90
00:04:10,817 --> 00:04:12,920
Ah! I'm so sorry
I'm late.

91
00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:15,489
This guy's charging
$15 for valet.

92
00:04:15,523 --> 00:04:17,091
So I parked it
nine blocks away.

93
00:04:17,124 --> 00:04:19,026
Wait a minute,
if you parked
that far away,

94
00:04:19,059 --> 00:04:21,262
how are you so dry?
You sweat just
getting the mail.

95
00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:23,397
It's the Fendi, babe.

96
00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:25,732
It's wicking away.
(LAUGHING)

97
00:04:26,534 --> 00:04:28,035
You want one?
Yeah.

98
00:04:28,068 --> 00:04:29,603
You know,
everyone said
I should serve

99
00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:31,804
fancy food
at my opening,
and I was like,

100
00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:36,644
"Name one person
that doesn't like
a hot dog."

101
00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:39,213
SEBASTIAN:
<i>And get this, she's an artist.</i>

102
00:04:39,246 --> 00:04:41,248
<i>I mean, growing up,</i>
<i>I wasn't even allowed</i>

103
00:04:41,282 --> 00:04:42,650
<i>to do it as a hobby.</i>

104
00:04:42,682 --> 00:04:43,716
So how's
the show going?

105
00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:46,053
Oh, my God!
Freaking amazing.

106
00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:48,088
All my pieces sold out
in like 15 minutes.

107
00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:50,690
Babe, that's incredible.
I know, right?

108
00:04:50,723 --> 00:04:52,993
I mean, most of them went
to this big decorator,

109
00:04:53,027 --> 00:04:56,463
but they have clients
all over the world,
so I'm not complaining.

110
00:04:56,497 --> 00:04:57,932
Well, you shouldn't.

111
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,034
Especially because they look,
kind of like, you know...

112
00:05:01,135 --> 00:05:02,336
ELLIE: Vaginas?

113
00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:05,906
Well, you know,
if you just hang
them horizontally,

114
00:05:08,042 --> 00:05:09,977
they kind of look
like sunsets.

115
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:11,278
Oh, yeah.

116
00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:12,479
(SOFTLY) Right.

117
00:05:12,513 --> 00:05:13,746
SEBASTIAN:
<i>Since the day I met her,</i>

118
00:05:13,780 --> 00:05:15,482
<i>she's been opening my eyes</i>

119
00:05:15,516 --> 00:05:18,319
<i>to all kinds</i>
<i>of new experiences.</i>

120
00:05:18,352 --> 00:05:19,620
<i>Like naps.</i>

121
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:21,555
Weird.

122
00:05:21,589 --> 00:05:23,823
The sun's coming
through the drapes.

123
00:05:23,856 --> 00:05:25,559
<i>And beauty treatments.</i>

124
00:05:25,593 --> 00:05:27,827
Hey, hot stuff.
Looking good.

125
00:05:27,860 --> 00:05:29,129
Wait, are you mad?

126
00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:30,264
Yeah.

127
00:05:30,297 --> 00:05:32,933
That it took 42 years
to discover avocado masks.

128
00:05:32,967 --> 00:05:35,135
<i>And last but not least,</i>

129
00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:36,170
<i>smiling.</i>

130
00:05:37,770 --> 00:05:39,739
Okay. Um...

131
00:05:39,772 --> 00:05:41,308
It's not natural.
That's...

132
00:05:41,342 --> 00:05:44,311
That's not
particularly natural.
But you know what I think?

133
00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:47,348
I think we just
have to build these
facial muscles,

134
00:05:47,381 --> 00:05:48,748
so you just
got to practice.

135
00:05:48,781 --> 00:05:50,783
Look at that.
Now try it.

136
00:05:50,817 --> 00:05:52,785
I don't...
(GASPS) You
look great.

137
00:05:55,389 --> 00:05:59,026
SEBASTIAN: <i>Yeah, life</i>
<i>with Ellie was pretty perfect.</i>

138
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:01,962
<i>(MY MAN</i> BY CRUSH CLUB
PLAYING ON SPEAKERS)

139
00:06:01,996 --> 00:06:03,464
SEBASTIAN:
I don't think
I could participate.

140
00:06:03,497 --> 00:06:04,598
That's just
ridiculous.

141
00:06:04,632 --> 00:06:05,966
ELLIE:
You promised.
Oh, come on!

142
00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:08,835
A public wedding
proposal? It's
embarrassing.

143
00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:10,504
ELLIE: I think
it's sweet.

144
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,339
When I propose
to you,

145
00:06:12,373 --> 00:06:13,674
it's going
to be intimate.

146
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,342
Hmm.
Just you and me,

147
00:06:15,376 --> 00:06:16,610
the way
it should be.

148
00:06:16,644 --> 00:06:18,345
Hmm.
No one else.

149
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:20,014
Used to be,
"If I propose."

150
00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:21,881
You just said,
"When I propose."

151
00:06:21,915 --> 00:06:23,816
Okay, babe,
it's just...
I'm aggravated.

152
00:06:23,850 --> 00:06:25,885
Words are just
flying out
of my mouth.

153
00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:26,954
Well, just
so you know,

154
00:06:26,987 --> 00:06:29,390
the only way
I will say yes,

155
00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:30,724
is if there is
some element

156
00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:32,493
of public
humiliation involved.

157
00:06:32,526 --> 00:06:33,927
Oh, well.
Get ready.

158
00:06:33,961 --> 00:06:35,895
You might as well just end
the relationship right now,

159
00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:38,165
because we ain't
doing that.
Oh, we're not?

160
00:06:38,198 --> 00:06:39,433
I'm not
doing this.
But you're

161
00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,068
such a good dancer.
Look at these people.

162
00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:44,538
MAN: Uh, Ellie?
I kind of need
your help right now.

163
00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:47,241
Right, dude,
we are in!

164
00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:49,510
(PEOPLE CHEERING)

165
00:06:52,379 --> 00:06:55,115
SEBASTIAN: <i>The truth was,</i>
<i>I had every intention</i>

166
00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:57,351
<i>of asking Ellie to marry me.</i>

167
00:06:58,319 --> 00:07:02,589
<i>I just needed</i>
<i>the right place and time.</i>

168
00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:07,795
SEBASTIAN: I see you, guy.
(KNOCKING ON WINDOW)

169
00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:09,797
I see you.

170
00:07:09,829 --> 00:07:12,299
All right? Pick it up.

171
00:07:12,333 --> 00:07:15,002
Thank you.
Take a walk.
ELLIE: Sebastian.

172
00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:17,237
I'm on the phone
with my parents
and get this,

173
00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:20,908
they're inviting us

174
00:07:21,675 --> 00:07:22,810
out to the summer place

175
00:07:22,842 --> 00:07:25,245
for the big
4th-of-July weekend.

176
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:27,781
Babe, did you
just say "us"?
Us.

177
00:07:27,815 --> 00:07:29,016
I thought this trip
was for family only.

178
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:31,018
I know! I mean,
I'm so torn

179
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:33,087
between thinking
this is great news,

180
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,154
or that I might be
dragging you

181
00:07:34,188 --> 00:07:35,888
into an Italian version
of <i>Get Out.</i>

182
00:07:35,923 --> 00:07:37,658
(WOMAN SPEAKING
INDISTINCTLY ON PHONE)
I'm not sure. Oh, uh, uh...

183
00:07:37,691 --> 00:07:41,161
Yes, yes, yes,
Mother, yes. I'm
asking him right now,

184
00:07:41,195 --> 00:07:42,496
please hold.

185
00:07:42,529 --> 00:07:43,731
(MOUTHING)
What do you think?

186
00:07:43,764 --> 00:07:45,299
(SNIFFLES)

187
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,837
ELLIE:
(SIGHS) Yeah.

188
00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:52,339
He's man-crying.
That means it's a yes.

189
00:07:52,373 --> 00:07:54,208
Yes!
I love you.

190
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:55,976
I'm gonna
get you tissues.

191
00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:58,712
I love you.
I'm so excited.

192
00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:01,448
SEBASTIAN: <i>So, yeah,</i>
<i>I'm a big crier.</i>

193
00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:04,752
<i>I love to just marinate</i>
<i>in my own tears.</i>

194
00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:05,986
BOTH: Mmm.

195
00:08:06,019 --> 00:08:08,222
SEBASTIAN:
<i>But this was a huge deal.</i>

196
00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:12,793
<i>Ellie's summer place wasn't</i>
<i>just the perfect spot</i>

197
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,228
<i>to propose.</i>

198
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:17,831
<i>It also meant her family was</i>
<i>starting to accept me.</i>

199
00:08:17,865 --> 00:08:20,267
<i>Which was amazing, because...</i>

200
00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,703
<i>How do I put this eloquently?</i>

201
00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:27,608
<i>These people got</i>
<i>class up the ass.</i>

202
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:34,515
<i>I mean, look at these people</i>
<i>with their perfect postures,</i>

203
00:08:34,548 --> 00:08:36,450
<i>and their perfect teeth.</i>

204
00:08:36,483 --> 00:08:38,485
<i>Even their dog went</i>
<i>to better schools</i>

205
00:08:38,519 --> 00:08:40,087
<i>than I did.</i>
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

206
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:41,388
SEBASTIAN: <i>I was intimidated,</i>

207
00:08:41,422 --> 00:08:43,190
<i>which really didn't</i>
<i>make any sense</i>

208
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:47,694
<i>as their story was also</i>
<i>an immigrant story.</i>

209
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:52,166
<i>For some reason, theirs was</i>
<i>considered more respectable,</i>

210
00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:54,835
<i>as it started 400 years ago.</i>

211
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,870
<i>Now, this is</i>
<i>an actual painting</i>

212
00:08:56,905 --> 00:08:59,106
<i>of Ellie's</i>
<i>10th great grandfather,</i>

213
00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:03,143
<i>William Love Collins,</i>
<i>taking his family to America,</i>

214
00:09:03,177 --> 00:09:06,547
<i>on a little boat called</i>
<i>the</i> Mayflower.

215
00:09:06,580 --> 00:09:09,183
<i>You got it. That one.</i>

216
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:12,553
<i>So while my father came</i>
<i>to chase the American dream,</i>

217
00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:15,823
<i>the Collins were</i>
<i>the American dream,</i>

218
00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:18,125
<i>all the way</i>
<i>up to Ellie's dad.</i>

219
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:20,861
<i>William Love Collins XII.</i>

220
00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:22,396
<i>Only Italian guys I knew</i>

221
00:09:22,429 --> 00:09:24,498
<i>with Roman numerals</i>
<i>after their names...</i>

222
00:09:24,531 --> 00:09:26,266
(CHURCH BELL TOLLING)
<i>...are popes,</i>

223
00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:29,236
<i>and Rocky Balboa.</i>
(INDISTINCT CHEERING)

224
00:09:29,269 --> 00:09:31,138
<i>Her dad is</i>
<i>the chairman and CEO</i>

225
00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:33,707
<i>of the luxurious</i>
<i>Collins Hotel Group,</i>

226
00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,075
<i>which was awkward,</i>

227
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:37,611
<i>as I happened to run</i>
<i>a cool new boutique hotel,</i>

228
00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:40,447
<i>which was stealing</i>
<i>a lot of his Chicago business.</i>

229
00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:42,216
<i>Bottom line?</i>

230
00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,586
<i>His baby girl was</i>
<i>dating the enemy.</i>

231
00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:49,056
<i>But Bill wasn't even</i>
<i>the scary parent.</i>

232
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,492
<i>That honor belonged</i>
<i>to Ellie's mother,</i>

233
00:09:51,525 --> 00:09:56,396
<i>whose actual birth name</i>
<i>was Tigger MacArthur.</i>

234
00:09:56,430 --> 00:09:59,600
Anna, darling,
you don't know
anything about me.

235
00:09:59,633 --> 00:10:02,269
SEBASTIAN:
<i>And this kitty's got claws.</i>

236
00:10:02,302 --> 00:10:04,571
<i>As an Ivy League</i>
<i>grad-turned-senator</i>

237
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:05,940
<i>for the state of Maryland,</i>

238
00:10:05,974 --> 00:10:07,741
<i>it took her a long time</i>

239
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:11,345
<i>to wrap her mind around</i>
<i>her beloved daughter dating</i>

240
00:10:11,378 --> 00:10:14,281
<i>some working-class</i>
<i>hotel manager.</i>

241
00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:16,583
How could I be
anti-immigrant

242
00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:20,187
when my daughter is
dating the son of one?

243
00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:22,389
SEBASTIAN:
<i>But this invite meant</i>

244
00:10:22,422 --> 00:10:25,325
<i>I was finally</i>
<i>breaking through.</i>

245
00:10:25,359 --> 00:10:28,028
<i>A holiday weekend was</i>
<i>my chance to charm</i>

246
00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:30,731
<i>the pleated pants</i>
<i>off these people.</i>

247
00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:32,766
<i>And if all went well,</i>

248
00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:36,336
<i>I could ask</i>
<i>for their daughter's</i>
<i>hand in marriage.</i>

249
00:10:38,006 --> 00:10:40,942
<i>So, I had the girl</i>
<i>I wanted to marry,</i>

250
00:10:40,975 --> 00:10:43,810
<i>the perfect spot</i>
<i>to propose to her,</i>

251
00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:46,346
<i>and now,</i>
<i>I just needed the ring,</i>

252
00:10:46,380 --> 00:10:48,815
<i>which should have</i>
<i>been easy to get.</i>

253
00:10:48,849 --> 00:10:49,883
Oh, come on. What do you mean

254
00:10:49,918 --> 00:10:51,485
you're not gonna
give me the ring?

255
00:10:51,518 --> 00:10:53,554
Grandma left it for me
to use when I'm ready
to get married.

256
00:10:53,587 --> 00:10:55,355
SALVO: Uh, your grandmother
left it with me

257
00:10:55,389 --> 00:10:56,823
to make sure you just
don't give it away

258
00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:59,192
to some <i>puttana,</i> that's what
your grandmother did.

259
00:10:59,226 --> 00:11:01,495
Can you come out
of the garden so
we can talk about this?

260
00:11:01,528 --> 00:11:03,797
(LEAVES RUSTLING)

261
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,867
They're back.
They're back there
messing with my <i>gagootz.</i>

262
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:08,602
Forget the <i>gagootz.</i>

263
00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:11,138
Dad, the ring,
can I have it?
Look at that.

264
00:11:12,239 --> 00:11:13,473
You know,
I don't know
about this girl,

265
00:11:13,507 --> 00:11:15,275
I gotta tell ya.
I'm not sure
about her.

266
00:11:15,309 --> 00:11:17,045
She put her feet up
on my coffee table,

267
00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:18,378
I don't know...
You put
your feet up

268
00:11:18,412 --> 00:11:19,746
on your
coffee table.
Yeah, my coffee table,

269
00:11:19,780 --> 00:11:20,881
my feet.

270
00:11:20,915 --> 00:11:22,182
What do you
think is this?

271
00:11:22,215 --> 00:11:24,685
What bites? A raccoon?
Ants? Is it an ant?

272
00:11:25,886 --> 00:11:27,588
An ant. You got
to to be kidding me.

273
00:11:28,923 --> 00:11:30,857
Let's see.
Okay, here we are.

274
00:11:30,891 --> 00:11:33,027
Look at them.
That's a possum.

275
00:11:33,061 --> 00:11:35,262
Possum. They're dead.

276
00:11:35,295 --> 00:11:36,663
Dead, gone.
Oh, no. Come on,

277
00:11:36,697 --> 00:11:38,899
with the thing again...
Gone from this earth.

278
00:11:38,933 --> 00:11:41,101
Instant death.
Just set a trap.

279
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:42,469
Yeah, I'm gonna
set a trap.

280
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:44,237
I'm gonna get
my antifreeze,
my little...

281
00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:45,739
SEBASTIAN: <i>When I was a kid,</i>

282
00:11:45,772 --> 00:11:48,609
<i>I thought everything</i>
<i>my dad did was normal.</i>

283
00:11:49,509 --> 00:11:51,678
<i>If some string beans</i>
<i>went missing,</i>

284
00:11:51,712 --> 00:11:55,115
<i>I'd wake up to a yard</i>
<i>full of poisoned squirrels,</i>

285
00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:57,250
<i>birds, chipmunks,</i>

286
00:11:57,284 --> 00:11:58,452
<i>basically anything</i>

287
00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:00,989
<i>that ever helped</i>
<i>Cinderella get dressed,</i>

288
00:12:01,022 --> 00:12:03,490
<i>murdered in our backyard.</i>

289
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,292
Come on, Dad.
Could you just admit

290
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,628
that Ellie's not
some <i>puttana?</i>

291
00:12:07,661 --> 00:12:08,729
I love her, you love her.

292
00:12:08,762 --> 00:12:11,565
Just give me the ring
so I can propose.

293
00:12:11,598 --> 00:12:13,034
You really serious
about this?

294
00:12:13,067 --> 00:12:14,701
Yeah, Dad,
she's the one.

295
00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:15,669
She's the one?
Yeah.

296
00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:17,105
Okay, son, you know
what I'm gonna do?

297
00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:18,505
I'm gonna give
you the ring.
Thank you.

298
00:12:18,538 --> 00:12:20,908
But first I gotta
meet her family.

299
00:12:20,942 --> 00:12:22,676
What? Why?
Why?

300
00:12:22,709 --> 00:12:25,312
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

301
00:12:25,345 --> 00:12:27,180
(IN ENGLISH) That's why.
What the hell
does that mean?

302
00:12:27,214 --> 00:12:29,083
(SCOFFS) You got
no respect
for your roots.

303
00:12:29,117 --> 00:12:30,384
I mean, what are
you talking about?

304
00:12:30,417 --> 00:12:31,752
You don't eat
the fruit till
you make sure

305
00:12:31,785 --> 00:12:32,987
the tree ain't sick.

306
00:12:33,021 --> 00:12:34,388
And per tradition,
I need to look

307
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:36,057
at the mother
and the father's eyes.

308
00:12:36,090 --> 00:12:37,457
I need to look them
in the eyes

309
00:12:37,491 --> 00:12:38,859
to make sure there's no rot.

310
00:12:38,892 --> 00:12:40,560
Because there could be rot.
Not that there is.
What?

311
00:12:40,594 --> 00:12:42,964
But there could be.
There's no rot
in this family, Dad.

312
00:12:42,997 --> 00:12:44,231
You never know.
They're classy.

313
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:46,067
You never know.
Come on, they're
classy people.

314
00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:47,334
Oh, yeah.

315
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:48,903
The fancier,
the dirtier.

316
00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:50,138
You never know
what's going on.

317
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:51,672
Plus, they don't live
anywhere near here.

318
00:12:51,705 --> 00:12:53,373
So let me just put you
on a FaceTime,

319
00:12:53,407 --> 00:12:55,009
so you could
taste test them
over the phone.

320
00:12:55,043 --> 00:12:58,245
Hey, I'm not doing FaceTime.
This is an important moment.

321
00:12:58,278 --> 00:12:59,846
FaceTime, Zoom?
What are you, crazy?

322
00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:02,016
You don't gotta
get all upset.
No, gotta be <i>faccia con faccia.</i>

323
00:13:02,050 --> 00:13:04,986
Dad, I want
to do this
next weekend

324
00:13:05,019 --> 00:13:07,287
at their family's house
in the country.

325
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:09,189
Wait... wait.
Hold on, hold on.

326
00:13:09,222 --> 00:13:10,624
This is the first summer

327
00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:13,027
since we had to say goodbye
to your poor dear mother,

328
00:13:13,061 --> 00:13:14,162
and you're going
to leave me alone

329
00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:15,930
for the goddamn 4th of July?

330
00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:17,197
Well, it's just that,
you know,

331
00:13:17,230 --> 00:13:19,666
her family invited me
to their summer house.

332
00:13:19,700 --> 00:13:20,767
Oh, their summer home?

333
00:13:20,801 --> 00:13:22,170
Oh, most people got one home,
but they got 'em

334
00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:23,704
for different seasons.
Oh, that's nice.

335
00:13:23,737 --> 00:13:25,539
Come on, Dad. So they got
more money than us,

336
00:13:25,572 --> 00:13:28,176
who doesn't? Plus,
it's just for one weekend.

337
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:30,677
Oh, one weekend, he says.
One weekend.

338
00:13:30,711 --> 00:13:32,846
Fifty years ago,
I come to this country

339
00:13:32,879 --> 00:13:34,048
to give you a better life.

340
00:13:34,082 --> 00:13:35,415
Fifty years ago,

341
00:13:35,449 --> 00:13:38,251
I skipped every weekend
in Sicily for you.

342
00:13:38,285 --> 00:13:39,686
I joined the US Army

343
00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:42,090
to protect your freedoms.
And what thanks do I get?

344
00:13:42,123 --> 00:13:43,925
You go celebrate
the 4th of July

345
00:13:43,958 --> 00:13:44,992
with some other family,

346
00:13:45,026 --> 00:13:46,127
leaving me
to burn the sparklers

347
00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,029
and eat the hot dogs alone!

348
00:13:48,062 --> 00:13:50,131
Alone! Thank you.

349
00:13:50,164 --> 00:13:51,933
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

350
00:13:51,966 --> 00:13:53,266
(IN ENGLISH)
This is incredible.

351
00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:56,003
(CONTINUES IN ITALIAN)

352
00:13:59,239 --> 00:14:01,142
Wait, what do you mean
you're not coming?

353
00:14:01,175 --> 00:14:03,376
I can't leave my father.

354
00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:05,712
The 4th of July was
their favorite holiday.

355
00:14:05,746 --> 00:14:07,581
Because of his
military background?

356
00:14:07,614 --> 00:14:10,650
No, it's the only holiday
you don't have to buy a gift.

357
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:12,285
I'm sorry, Ellie.

358
00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:14,254
We'll just do it
some other time.

359
00:14:14,287 --> 00:14:15,455
Why don't
we just bring him?

360
00:14:15,489 --> 00:14:16,623
(HESITATES) What happened?

361
00:14:16,656 --> 00:14:20,061
I mean, if he...
loves the 4th,

362
00:14:20,094 --> 00:14:21,762
he's gonna flip out
at our place.

363
00:14:21,795 --> 00:14:24,631
There's all
kinds of fun
family activities.

364
00:14:24,664 --> 00:14:27,135
There's fireworks.
There's even a huge clambake

365
00:14:27,168 --> 00:14:29,036
with tons of fresh fish.

366
00:14:29,070 --> 00:14:30,604
He loves to de-bone fish.

367
00:14:31,271 --> 00:14:32,472
Kind of perfect.

368
00:14:33,573 --> 00:14:36,210
SEBASTIAN: <i>My father</i>
<i>getting a close-up look</i>

369
00:14:36,244 --> 00:14:37,477
<i>at my new life,</i>

370
00:14:37,511 --> 00:14:39,379
<i>while I was trying</i>
<i>to seal the deal</i>

371
00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:41,281
<i>with Ellie's parents?</i>

372
00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:43,383
<i>What an incredible idea!</i>

373
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:44,618
Nah, I don't think so.

374
00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:46,653
I should probably
just stay here with him.

375
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:47,888
Boo!

376
00:14:48,722 --> 00:14:50,690
Come on.

377
00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:53,426
Don't you want
our families
to finally meet?

378
00:14:53,460 --> 00:14:55,529
(IN HIGH-PITCH)
Yeah, of course I do.

379
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,266
Why is your voice
going up like that?

380
00:14:58,298 --> 00:14:59,599
What's going on?

381
00:15:00,034 --> 00:15:01,068
Are you...

382
00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:04,471
Are you nervous
to bring him?

383
00:15:04,504 --> 00:15:06,373
Ner... No. (CHUCKLES)

384
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,408
No. What? No, no.

385
00:15:08,441 --> 00:15:09,843
All right, fine.

386
00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:11,812
Don't bring him.

387
00:15:11,845 --> 00:15:12,914
Don't come.

388
00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:16,850
Don't have fun.
It's fine.

389
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:18,819
SEBASTIAN: <i>All right,</i>
<i>maybe I was a little scared</i>

390
00:15:18,852 --> 00:15:21,588
<i>to bring my father</i>
<i>into a country club</i>
<i>environment,</i>

391
00:15:21,621 --> 00:15:24,292
<i>where he'd see me playing</i>
<i>racquet sports,</i>

392
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:27,828
<i>riding around in golf carts,</i>
<i>and taking naps.</i>

393
00:15:27,861 --> 00:15:30,664
<i>But I also knew</i>
<i>that stubborn bastard wouldn't</i>

394
00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:33,700
<i>give me the ring without</i>
<i>a face-to-face meeting.</i>

395
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,703
Fine. You win.
I'll ask him.

396
00:15:37,238 --> 00:15:38,338
(EXCLAIMS HAPPILY)

397
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:40,141
Hey, don't get
all excited, all right?

398
00:15:40,174 --> 00:15:43,177
This guy's big on tradition.
I doubt he'll even say yes.

399
00:15:43,211 --> 00:15:44,511
Shit, yeah. I'm coming.

400
00:15:44,544 --> 00:15:45,980
No, wait, wait,
wait. Seriously?

401
00:15:46,013 --> 00:15:47,614
Of course, I'm coming.
What are we gonna
do instead?

402
00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:48,715
Spend the whole
weekend alone,

403
00:15:48,748 --> 00:15:50,017
just the two of us
in the house,

404
00:15:50,051 --> 00:15:51,185
burning the sparklers

405
00:15:51,219 --> 00:15:53,221
and eating the hotdogs?
Yeah, I'm coming.

406
00:15:53,254 --> 00:15:54,487
That's the same
example you used

407
00:15:54,521 --> 00:15:55,822
to guilt trip me
into not going.

408
00:15:55,856 --> 00:15:57,824
Well, what can I say.
I got a way with words.

409
00:15:57,858 --> 00:15:58,926
You know me.

410
00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:00,228
All right, listen.
If we're gonna do this, Dad,

411
00:16:00,261 --> 00:16:01,494
you gotta be
on your best behavior.

412
00:16:01,528 --> 00:16:03,231
Wha... What do you mean,
my best behavior?

413
00:16:03,264 --> 00:16:04,898
The family is uptight,

414
00:16:04,932 --> 00:16:06,433
they're conservative,
they're not used to...

415
00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:07,667
Hold on, hold on, hold on.

416
00:16:07,701 --> 00:16:10,204
So, you, the son, are
telling me, the father,

417
00:16:10,238 --> 00:16:11,438
how to behave?

418
00:16:11,973 --> 00:16:13,241
You hear this?

419
00:16:13,274 --> 00:16:15,343
Just remember the main goal
is for you to meet the family,

420
00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:17,444
so I can get the ring
and propose to Ellie.

421
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:18,545
It's not for you
to price check

422
00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:19,713
their antique coffee tables.

423
00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:21,315
Come on, already!
I mean, how fancy

424
00:16:21,349 --> 00:16:22,549
could a stupid
coffee table be?

425
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:24,318
I mean, seriously,
how much we talking?

426
00:16:24,352 --> 00:16:26,254
I don't know, Dad.

427
00:16:26,287 --> 00:16:28,755
I'm kidding you. <i>Mannaggia.</i>
(IN ENGLISH) Where's
your sense of humor?

428
00:16:28,788 --> 00:16:30,024
Jeez. Come on.
All I'm asking is

429
00:16:30,057 --> 00:16:31,391
dial it down with the...

430
00:16:31,424 --> 00:16:32,459
(MOCKING SALVO)
What, all the...

431
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:33,627
This is...
What is this?

432
00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:35,263
Look at him.
Look at him.

433
00:16:35,296 --> 00:16:36,396
Dial it down
with all this
and that.

434
00:16:36,429 --> 00:16:37,464
You know what
he's worried about?

435
00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:38,698
He's worried

436
00:16:38,732 --> 00:16:40,268
his immigrant father's
gonna make him look

437
00:16:40,301 --> 00:16:42,003
like some kind
of goombah.

438
00:16:42,036 --> 00:16:43,070
Let me tell you something.

439
00:16:43,104 --> 00:16:44,804
You don't remember
this because I'm your dad

440
00:16:44,838 --> 00:16:46,673
but a lot of people
find me charming,

441
00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:48,209
pretty charming,
that's right. Right.

442
00:16:48,242 --> 00:16:49,442
Right, ladies?
WOMEN: Yeah.

443
00:16:49,476 --> 00:16:51,645
(CHUCKLES) And these
stuck-up rich people?

444
00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:52,812
They got a word for me...

445
00:16:52,846 --> 00:16:55,249
I remember, it's loud,
it's obnoxious,

446
00:16:55,283 --> 00:16:56,549
it's over-cologned.

447
00:16:56,583 --> 00:16:58,485
No, no. "Refreshing."

448
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,420
"He's refreshing."
"He's so original."

449
00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:02,656
I've heard that all...
All the time I hear that.

450
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:05,159
And I promise you
Ellie's parents
are gonna love me.

451
00:17:05,192 --> 00:17:06,860
I don't know about
you, but they're going
to love me.

452
00:17:06,893 --> 00:17:08,461
Mm-hmm.
Ladies,
you better get

453
00:17:08,495 --> 00:17:09,863
your 'dos done
by Thursday

454
00:17:09,896 --> 00:17:12,465
'cause the Maniscalco men,
they're going on vacation.

455
00:17:14,168 --> 00:17:15,568
He's worried.

456
00:17:15,602 --> 00:17:17,604
This kid is
worried. I'm not.

457
00:17:17,637 --> 00:17:20,908
( <i>IL MONDO</i> BY IL VOLO PLAYING)

458
00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:37,291
(LIGHTER CLICKS)
What the hell
are you doing?

459
00:17:37,325 --> 00:17:39,160
You can't smoke here.
What? I'm outside.

460
00:17:39,193 --> 00:17:40,227
Next to an airplane!

461
00:17:40,261 --> 00:17:42,063
Oh, sorry!
STEWARDESS: That's okay.

462
00:17:42,096 --> 00:17:44,999
<i>Mannaggia.</i>
Can't even
smoke a cigar.

463
00:17:45,032 --> 00:17:46,499
I got some
good news.

464
00:17:46,533 --> 00:17:48,169
I got us
a luxury sedan

465
00:17:48,202 --> 00:17:49,904
for the price
of a compact.

466
00:17:49,937 --> 00:17:51,571
That's nice,
but makes
me wonder

467
00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:53,540
how much the compact
you could've got for.

468
00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:55,742
Then I took
the compact price

469
00:17:55,775 --> 00:17:57,477
and got it
on the house!
(CHUCKLING)

470
00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:59,180
Hey!
Hey! Nice!

471
00:17:59,213 --> 00:18:01,548
Baby, the bags.
Yeah. How long does
it take to get there?

472
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:03,451
Um, like, three hours.

473
00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:05,119
Hey, you guys
looking for a ride?

474
00:18:06,053 --> 00:18:07,787
(GASPS) Oh, my God.

475
00:18:07,821 --> 00:18:09,056
Lucky!

476
00:18:09,090 --> 00:18:10,523
SEBASTIAN: Oh, no.

477
00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:12,259
Who's that,
an ex-boyfriend?

478
00:18:12,293 --> 00:18:13,626
Worse. Brother.

479
00:18:13,660 --> 00:18:15,262
LUCKY: Hey!
(ELLIE SCREAMING)

480
00:18:15,296 --> 00:18:16,998
(ELLIE SCREAMING INDISTINCTLY)

481
00:18:17,031 --> 00:18:19,967
SEBASTIAN: <i>While I'd made</i>
<i>progress with Ellie's parents,</i>

482
00:18:20,001 --> 00:18:23,070
<i>I'd yet to make any</i>
<i>with the older brother.</i>

483
00:18:23,104 --> 00:18:26,107
<i>His name was</i>
<i>William Love Collins XIII.</i>

484
00:18:26,140 --> 00:18:28,943
<i>So, everybody called</i>
<i>this guy "Lucky."</i>

485
00:18:28,976 --> 00:18:30,344
<i>And that's exactly</i>

486
00:18:30,378 --> 00:18:31,778
<i>what he was.</i>
ALL: Chug, chug, chug,

487
00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:32,913
Whoo!

488
00:18:32,947 --> 00:18:34,015
Oh, my God!

489
00:18:34,048 --> 00:18:35,715
SEBASTIAN: <i>After graduating</i>
<i>from Princeton,</i>

490
00:18:35,749 --> 00:18:38,052
<i>back when you could</i>
<i>bribe your kid into college,</i>

491
00:18:38,085 --> 00:18:40,587
<i>Lucky was on deck</i>
<i>to take over the Hotel Group</i>

492
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:42,789
<i>while working</i>
<i>as a "Client Liaison."</i>

493
00:18:42,822 --> 00:18:46,160
Gentlemen! Who's ready to go
hunt some endangered species?

494
00:18:46,193 --> 00:18:48,162
I'm just kidding.
Unless you guys
are down,

495
00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:49,596
I can figure
something out.

496
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:51,265
SEBASTIAN: <i>This meant</i>
<i>traveling around the world,</i>

497
00:18:51,298 --> 00:18:52,832
<i>entertaining wealthy clients</i>

498
00:18:52,866 --> 00:18:54,368
<i>with all the rich kid hobbies</i>

499
00:18:54,402 --> 00:18:56,470
<i>he had time to master.</i>
Whoo!

500
00:18:56,504 --> 00:18:57,570
SEBASTIAN:
<i>We're talking skiing...</i>

501
00:18:57,604 --> 00:19:00,074
Whoo! Snowboarding sucks!

502
00:19:00,107 --> 00:19:02,476
SEBASTIAN: ...y <i>achting.</i>
(SLURPING)

503
00:19:02,510 --> 00:19:04,644
<i>...all the country club sports.</i>

504
00:19:04,677 --> 00:19:07,081
Whoo! Looks like
I gotta change
my shoes,

505
00:19:07,114 --> 00:19:09,716
'cause I'm on
the dance floor. What!

506
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:11,684
(EXCLAIMING
IN EXCITEMENT)

507
00:19:11,718 --> 00:19:14,422
SEBASTIAN: <i>But I'd say</i>
<i>his overall best skill</i>

508
00:19:14,455 --> 00:19:16,524
<i>was being a prick.</i>
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)

509
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:17,891
LUCKY: <i>There he is.</i>

510
00:19:17,925 --> 00:19:19,592
I see you're still
banging the bellboy.

511
00:19:19,626 --> 00:19:21,228
ELLIE: Luck! No!
LUCKY: Hey!

512
00:19:21,262 --> 00:19:22,729
I'm only joking,
Sea Bass.

513
00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:23,964
(SPEAKING SPANISH)

514
00:19:23,998 --> 00:19:25,799
Hey, what's up,
Luck?
(IN ENGLISH) Not much.

515
00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:27,101
You must be
Sebastian's brother.

516
00:19:27,134 --> 00:19:29,203
Hey. No, I'm
his father. Salvo.
How are you?

517
00:19:29,236 --> 00:19:30,603
No way! Seriously?

518
00:19:30,637 --> 00:19:32,273
That's crazy.
I can't tell the age

519
00:19:32,306 --> 00:19:33,573
of anybody over 40.

520
00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:35,809
(SCOFFS)
Anyway. Oh, let me

521
00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:38,145
goose you guys
some free samps.

522
00:19:38,179 --> 00:19:39,080
I'm an angel investor

523
00:19:39,113 --> 00:19:42,116
in this new anti-aging
skin cream for men

524
00:19:42,149 --> 00:19:43,716
and I'm obvi a client.

525
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:45,718
(CHUCKLES)
This guy.

526
00:19:45,752 --> 00:19:46,820
You boys ready to saddle up?

527
00:19:46,853 --> 00:19:48,322
(GASPS)
LUCKY: Let's go!

528
00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:50,157
Oh, chopper time!

529
00:19:50,191 --> 00:19:52,393
El... El, I don't
think this is such
a good idea.

530
00:19:52,426 --> 00:19:53,994
Yeah, we got
a free car,
you know.

531
00:19:54,028 --> 00:19:55,595
Guys, come on!

532
00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:58,499
Trust me, the helicopter
takes 20 minutes,

533
00:19:58,532 --> 00:20:01,469
and the views
are magical.

534
00:20:01,502 --> 00:20:03,003
Are you with me?
(SIGHS)

535
00:20:03,037 --> 00:20:06,006
Come on! Let's
have some fun!

536
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:08,375
MAN: (ON RADIO) <i>Lucky,</i>
<i>you are cleared for takeoff.</i>

537
00:20:08,409 --> 00:20:09,910
LUCKY: Roger that, Roger.

538
00:20:09,944 --> 00:20:11,744
Dude's name is Roger. We hang.

539
00:20:11,778 --> 00:20:13,646
Got a super-hot wife.

540
00:20:15,983 --> 00:20:17,118
Hey, if you guys
look out to your left,

541
00:20:17,151 --> 00:20:19,819
you'll see the beautiful
Roanoke River.

542
00:20:20,321 --> 00:20:21,355
ELLIE: Baby, look.

543
00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:24,425
Salvo, it's nice, right?

544
00:20:24,458 --> 00:20:26,026
Yeah. Yeah,
yeah, it's nice.

545
00:20:26,060 --> 00:20:27,194
Reminds me of 'Nam.

546
00:20:27,228 --> 00:20:28,661
(EXHALES)

547
00:20:33,934 --> 00:20:36,170
Huh?
Yeah, I'm fine.
It's good.

548
00:20:36,203 --> 00:20:37,770
Okay. Okay.
I'm fine.

549
00:20:38,339 --> 00:20:39,507
(THUDDING)

550
00:20:39,540 --> 00:20:40,874
Oh, yeah.
Sorry. Sorry.

551
00:20:40,908 --> 00:20:42,276
I got it. I got it.
(ELLIE CHUCKLES)

552
00:20:42,309 --> 00:20:43,544
(LUCKY CHUCKLING)

553
00:20:43,577 --> 00:20:45,812
Had a couple
too many G and Ts.

554
00:20:45,845 --> 00:20:47,780
He's kidding. He's kidding.
SALVO: Yeah, yeah.

555
00:20:49,016 --> 00:20:51,118
The air don't work.
SALVO: No, it does.

556
00:20:51,152 --> 00:20:52,719
It works, it works.

557
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,721
It's okay.
Only a couple of minutes.

558
00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:56,789
It's just
a little warm, Dad.
Son, it's...

559
00:20:56,823 --> 00:20:58,758
I think we got a problem here.

560
00:20:58,791 --> 00:21:00,027
What?
We got
a problem here.

561
00:21:00,060 --> 00:21:01,694
Oh, my God! Baby!
(SEBASTIAN
WHEEZING)

562
00:21:01,728 --> 00:21:02,963
Yeah, I can't breathe.
Wait, wait, wait.

563
00:21:02,997 --> 00:21:04,465
Take a bite out of the lemon.

564
00:21:04,498 --> 00:21:05,865
It'll help with
the nausea.
I'm not doing a whole lemon.

565
00:21:05,899 --> 00:21:07,168
I'll cut it.
I'll cut it.
Don't worry.

566
00:21:07,201 --> 00:21:08,102
Hey.

567
00:21:08,135 --> 00:21:09,470
I'll cut it
into pieces.
Hold on.

568
00:21:09,503 --> 00:21:10,870
I got a knife.
(GASPS)

569
00:21:10,905 --> 00:21:12,106
He's got a knife.
Oh, my God.

570
00:21:12,139 --> 00:21:13,740
He's got a knife.
I'm cutting the lemon.

571
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:15,442
Okay, here.
Take it. Take it.
Baby, suck it.

572
00:21:15,476 --> 00:21:18,045
Suck on that.
ELLIE: Suck on
that lemon. Suck.

573
00:21:18,078 --> 00:21:20,214
ELLIE: Just suck!
Suck, suck, suck!

574
00:21:20,247 --> 00:21:22,183
LUCKY: Sounds like
my Saturday night.
ELLIE: Suck!

575
00:21:22,216 --> 00:21:24,051
LUCKY: Dude.
Do not vom in my bird.

576
00:21:24,084 --> 00:21:25,386
He's not gonna vom
in your bird.

577
00:21:25,419 --> 00:21:26,819
Just breathe
in through the nose,

578
00:21:26,853 --> 00:21:28,022
out through the mouth.
SALVO: Suck on that.

579
00:21:28,055 --> 00:21:30,191
It's making it worse.
Suck it!

580
00:21:30,224 --> 00:21:31,525
LUCKY: Cradle the balls.
SALVO: Suck on that!

581
00:21:31,559 --> 00:21:32,725
ELLIE: You just suck!
Just suck it.

582
00:21:32,759 --> 00:21:35,095
Suck the lemon!
SALVO: Take it easy, kid.

583
00:21:35,129 --> 00:21:36,796
I think we should
turn around.
He's freaking out.

584
00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:37,998
It's like 19 more minutes.

585
00:21:38,032 --> 00:21:39,533
You can't tough
it out for 19...
It stinks!

586
00:21:39,567 --> 00:21:42,169
Let's bring it down.
Let's bring it...
Open up the windows!

587
00:21:42,203 --> 00:21:43,304
I'm gonna die!

588
00:21:43,337 --> 00:21:44,605
Put the air conditioning
down there.
Bring it down.

589
00:21:44,638 --> 00:21:45,872
How are you so calm?
LUCKY: Roger,

590
00:21:45,906 --> 00:21:47,740
we're coming back.
I'm dying!
Put it down!

591
00:21:47,774 --> 00:21:49,876
Put it down! Ah!

592
00:21:51,679 --> 00:21:53,214
(SIGHS)

593
00:21:56,483 --> 00:21:59,386
I knew I should've
forced him
to join the army.

594
00:21:59,420 --> 00:22:01,754
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Laugh it up.

595
00:22:01,788 --> 00:22:02,822
Laugh it up, guys.

596
00:22:02,855 --> 00:22:05,092
I'm just happy
I'm on the ground.

597
00:22:07,061 --> 00:22:10,497
Okay, gentlemen.
Welcome to White Oak.

598
00:22:11,764 --> 00:22:13,434
Wow!
Right?

599
00:22:13,467 --> 00:22:14,568
Ah, boy.

600
00:22:14,602 --> 00:22:16,971
Um, okay, so, that's
the golf course,

601
00:22:17,004 --> 00:22:21,275
and then
the tennis courts are
back down there.

602
00:22:21,308 --> 00:22:24,144
Oh, baby, look. Right there?
That's my childhood fort.

603
00:22:24,178 --> 00:22:25,446
SEBASTIAN: Oh.
ELLIE: We'd go there.

604
00:22:25,479 --> 00:22:26,680
whenever I needed
to get away from my family.

605
00:22:26,714 --> 00:22:28,515
So, basically, all the time.

606
00:22:28,549 --> 00:22:29,882
Yeah, I wish
I had one.

607
00:22:29,917 --> 00:22:32,852
(GASPS) Oh, look!

608
00:22:32,885 --> 00:22:36,856
Oh, my God! It's
Sergeant Feathers
and his family!

609
00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:38,891
SEBASTIAN: What is this?
Oh, my God!

610
00:22:38,926 --> 00:22:40,561
SEBASTIAN: What are you doing?

611
00:22:40,594 --> 00:22:42,463
(GASPS) What up, dudes?
SEBASTIAN: What are you...
Is this safe?

612
00:22:42,496 --> 00:22:43,731
Yeah, no, she's crazy.

613
00:22:43,763 --> 00:22:46,066
What's that? What are
you doing? Be careful.

614
00:22:46,100 --> 00:22:47,568
SEBASTIAN:
Get back in the car!

615
00:22:47,601 --> 00:22:49,303
They're gonna eat you alive!

616
00:22:49,336 --> 00:22:50,704
Oh, my God!
Aren't they
the best?

617
00:22:50,738 --> 00:22:51,771
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

618
00:22:51,804 --> 00:22:53,207
They're
so beautiful!

619
00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:55,009
So how much
a peacock cost anyway?

620
00:22:55,042 --> 00:22:56,410
SEBASTIAN:
Don't answer that, El.

621
00:22:56,443 --> 00:22:58,512
SALVO: I didn't know they had
peacocks in Virginia.

622
00:22:58,545 --> 00:23:01,881
Oh, well,
my grandfather brought
two here decades ago,

623
00:23:01,915 --> 00:23:03,183
but they didn't
like their cages,

624
00:23:03,217 --> 00:23:04,817
so he decided
to let them roam free.

625
00:23:04,851 --> 00:23:06,086
And now, they've
pretty much just become

626
00:23:06,120 --> 00:23:08,055
the official mascots
of our club.

627
00:23:08,088 --> 00:23:09,822
Well, they're bad luck
where I come from.

628
00:23:09,856 --> 00:23:11,759
They're just a bunch
of goddamn showoffs,

629
00:23:11,791 --> 00:23:13,727
if you ask me.
I don't like them.

630
00:23:13,761 --> 00:23:14,894
They're lucky
to be born that way.

631
00:23:14,928 --> 00:23:16,163
They could've been
born like a chicken,

632
00:23:16,196 --> 00:23:17,097
or a pigeon.

633
00:23:17,131 --> 00:23:18,798
I mean, it just has
fancy feathers,

634
00:23:18,831 --> 00:23:20,701
so all of a sudden,
it gets more respect.

635
00:23:20,734 --> 00:23:23,803
(CHUCKLES) Okay, guys.

636
00:23:23,836 --> 00:23:26,073
We're here.
Welcome to our house.

637
00:23:27,408 --> 00:23:30,978
SEBASTIAN: Look at this!
Are you kidding me?

638
00:23:31,011 --> 00:23:32,246
SALVO: How much
a house like this cost?

639
00:23:32,279 --> 00:23:34,682
SEBASTIAN: Enough
with the <i>Price is Right!</i>

640
00:23:34,715 --> 00:23:36,984
ELLIE: He's the Bob Barker
of the backseat.
(SEBASTIAN GROANS)

641
00:23:37,017 --> 00:23:38,652
(CAR HORN HONKING)

642
00:23:38,686 --> 00:23:41,422
Oh, my little
cuddle monkey!
Hey! Hi!

643
00:23:41,455 --> 00:23:42,723
Hi.
(TIGGER LAUGHING)

644
00:23:42,756 --> 00:23:44,725
Oh, my girl.
BILL: Oh!

645
00:23:44,758 --> 00:23:46,760
Oh, what a beauty!
Ellie-Bellie!

646
00:23:46,794 --> 00:23:48,562
SEBASTIAN: <i>You know,</i>
<i>looking back at this,</i>

647
00:23:48,595 --> 00:23:50,597
<i>my dad had to be overwhelmed.</i>

648
00:23:50,631 --> 00:23:52,066
Family's a little
handsy, huh?

649
00:23:52,099 --> 00:23:54,201
It's called
love and
affection, Dad.

650
00:23:54,234 --> 00:23:56,003
Unlike you,
when you met me
in the delivery room

651
00:23:56,036 --> 00:23:57,338
and chose
to shake
my hand.

652
00:23:57,371 --> 00:23:59,606
What else was I
supposed to do?
We just met.

653
00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:01,275
(SIGHS)
Huh?

654
00:24:01,308 --> 00:24:02,576
ELLIE: Guys,
come on. I want
you to meet

655
00:24:02,609 --> 00:24:04,078
Sebastian's father.

656
00:24:04,111 --> 00:24:05,412
Hey, Sebastian.
Hi.

657
00:24:05,446 --> 00:24:06,480
Nice to see you.

658
00:24:06,513 --> 00:24:07,781
Pleasure. Welcome.
SALVO: Nice
to meet you.

659
00:24:07,815 --> 00:24:09,316
Sebastian,
so good
to see you.

660
00:24:10,284 --> 00:24:14,121
And you must be
the charming Salvo.

661
00:24:14,154 --> 00:24:16,856
So nice to
finally meet you
in person, Tigger.

662
00:24:16,889 --> 00:24:18,492
It's just last week
I was checking out

663
00:24:18,525 --> 00:24:20,194
your highlights
on TV.

664
00:24:20,227 --> 00:24:22,563
Oh, the CNN
or the Fox ones?

665
00:24:22,596 --> 00:24:23,896
No, no,
the blonde ones.

666
00:24:23,931 --> 00:24:25,566
You hair,
if I can say, is

667
00:24:25,599 --> 00:24:26,834
just like
a block
of marble.

668
00:24:26,866 --> 00:24:28,335
I wanna sink
my tools into it.

669
00:24:28,369 --> 00:24:29,970
Dad, Dad,
Dad, what are
you doing?

670
00:24:30,003 --> 00:24:31,372
Sorry, I mean, it's...
You're gonna hit her.

671
00:24:31,405 --> 00:24:33,674
Well, Salvo, we've
heard you're quite
the stylist.

672
00:24:33,707 --> 00:24:34,874
Now, tell me this,

673
00:24:34,908 --> 00:24:36,176
do you think
I'm too old
to pull off

674
00:24:36,210 --> 00:24:37,544
a set of
frosted tips?

675
00:24:37,578 --> 00:24:39,279
(ALL LAUGHING)

676
00:24:41,315 --> 00:24:42,616
"Frosted tips?"

677
00:24:42,649 --> 00:24:44,852
Good one, sir! Solid gold!

678
00:24:44,884 --> 00:24:46,220
All right,
I'm gonna
hit the links.

679
00:24:46,253 --> 00:24:47,421
ELLIE: Have fun!
LUCKY: <i>Hasta luego!</i>

680
00:24:47,454 --> 00:24:49,656
So, uh, why
don't you
come inside,

681
00:24:49,690 --> 00:24:51,158
and we'll
give you
the grand tour.

682
00:24:51,191 --> 00:24:52,760
Don't worry
about the bags.

683
00:24:52,793 --> 00:24:54,661
Wendell will
take care
of them.

684
00:24:54,695 --> 00:24:55,895
ELLIE: Mommy...

685
00:24:55,929 --> 00:24:57,364
SALVO: That's
a pretty big dog
you got there.

686
00:24:57,398 --> 00:24:58,866
BILL: Oh, that's Duke.

687
00:24:58,898 --> 00:25:00,534
We don't get too rough
with him, 'cause we're
afraid he'll kill us.

688
00:25:00,567 --> 00:25:01,969
(ALL LAUGHING)
He's so big!

689
00:25:02,002 --> 00:25:03,137
ELLIE: Dad!
BILL: This is our house.

690
00:25:03,170 --> 00:25:04,438
SEBASTIAN: Wow!
TIGGER: Yes.

691
00:25:04,471 --> 00:25:06,006
SALVO: It's unbelievable.
TIGGER: It's so big.

692
00:25:06,039 --> 00:25:07,508
(ALL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
TIGGER: Oh, this is

693
00:25:07,541 --> 00:25:10,244
our youngest son, Doug.

694
00:25:10,277 --> 00:25:11,678
He's practicing...
ELLIE: Hi!

695
00:25:11,712 --> 00:25:13,247
...his sound bowls.

696
00:25:13,280 --> 00:25:15,315
Oh, yeah... Sound bowls?
What is that?

697
00:25:15,349 --> 00:25:17,184
Oh, well, now,
a sound bowl is...

698
00:25:17,217 --> 00:25:18,752
It's, actually,
it's an instrument.

699
00:25:18,786 --> 00:25:21,021
It puts out
this vibration

700
00:25:21,054 --> 00:25:23,857
that relieves stress
and promotes relaxation.

701
00:25:23,891 --> 00:25:26,427
He's...
he's learning
to be a healer.

702
00:25:26,460 --> 00:25:27,528
(CHUCKLING)

703
00:25:27,561 --> 00:25:29,763
Uh, but we're
just so proud
of him.

704
00:25:29,797 --> 00:25:31,031
You're so loud, Dad.

705
00:25:31,064 --> 00:25:32,433
Oh, sorry.
Oh, sorry,
sorry.

706
00:25:32,466 --> 00:25:34,903
Let me just...
Sorry. No, I'm
gonna close the...

707
00:25:34,935 --> 00:25:36,170
Play, boy, play.

708
00:25:36,203 --> 00:25:39,072
Play to soothe
the savage beast.

709
00:25:39,106 --> 00:25:40,841
Well, you don't have
to shut 'em.

710
00:25:40,874 --> 00:25:42,109
(BILL CHUCKLING)

711
00:25:42,142 --> 00:25:44,978
Wow! This house
is amazing!

712
00:25:45,012 --> 00:25:46,847
Look at this!
TIGGER: This is nothing.

713
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,248
You should see
the place in Aspen.

714
00:25:48,282 --> 00:25:50,984
(ALL CHUCKLING)
Well, it's just,
you know...

715
00:25:51,018 --> 00:25:53,887
Yeah.
I love this
cocktail table.

716
00:25:53,922 --> 00:25:56,523
Oh, Sebastian!

717
00:25:56,557 --> 00:25:58,325
Good eye!

718
00:25:58,358 --> 00:26:01,829
The first
commercial coal mine
in the country was

719
00:26:01,862 --> 00:26:03,063
right down
the road
from here,

720
00:26:03,096 --> 00:26:06,066
and this piece is
made out
of the wood

721
00:26:06,099 --> 00:26:08,802
from one
of the original
mine cars.

722
00:26:08,836 --> 00:26:11,371
Drenched
in history.
Drenched.

723
00:26:11,405 --> 00:26:13,173
Good for you,
re-using old wood
like that.

724
00:26:13,207 --> 00:26:14,575
BILL: Yes.
This guy always
gets on me

725
00:26:14,608 --> 00:26:16,610
about picking up
trash and putting
it in the house.

726
00:26:16,643 --> 00:26:18,145
(CHUCKLES)
Trash?

727
00:26:18,178 --> 00:26:19,580
It's crazy, the stuff
that people throw
away these days.

728
00:26:19,613 --> 00:26:21,615
It sure beats
paying for it,
I mean, right?

729
00:26:21,648 --> 00:26:23,717
So, I... I take it.
Right.

730
00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:26,053
Yes. Yes.
That is

731
00:26:26,086 --> 00:26:27,521
so true.
Yeah.

732
00:26:27,554 --> 00:26:30,290
Um, actually,
though, we did
pay for this one.

733
00:26:30,324 --> 00:26:32,359
(ELLIE CHUCKLES)
A king's ransom,
(CHUCKLES)

734
00:26:32,392 --> 00:26:35,329
if I must say,
but at least
it's too rickety

735
00:26:35,362 --> 00:26:37,097
to put drinks on.
(ALL CHUCKLING)

736
00:26:37,130 --> 00:26:38,499
Dad, that's
the worst.

737
00:26:38,532 --> 00:26:41,301
No, no, we just,
we wanted
something

738
00:26:41,335 --> 00:26:44,104
that matched
the art
in the room.

739
00:26:44,137 --> 00:26:45,272
SALVO: Oh, good for you,

740
00:26:45,305 --> 00:26:47,307
hanging up
your kids'
art work like that.

741
00:26:47,341 --> 00:26:53,280
No, these are
original Grandma Moseses.

742
00:26:53,313 --> 00:26:54,381
Can you
believe it?
I'm... I'm sorry.

743
00:26:54,414 --> 00:26:55,883
BILL: We
found them...
I'm sorry.

744
00:26:55,917 --> 00:26:57,618
BILL: What?
I'm sorry.
I mean, I...

745
00:26:57,651 --> 00:26:59,319
I didn't mean
to insult your
grandmother.

746
00:26:59,353 --> 00:27:01,555
I meant
no disrespect.
I had no idea.

747
00:27:01,588 --> 00:27:03,123
I mean, what was
the matter with her?

748
00:27:03,156 --> 00:27:04,993
Was she a little...
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

749
00:27:05,025 --> 00:27:06,059
(IN ENGLISH)
Oh, my God.

750
00:27:06,093 --> 00:27:07,728
Hey, who's hungry
for lunch?

751
00:27:07,761 --> 00:27:09,129
I am.
ELLIE: Me, me, me!

752
00:27:09,162 --> 00:27:10,731
We could all go
down to The Shack.

753
00:27:10,764 --> 00:27:12,766
ELLIE: Oh, Salvo,
you're gonna love The Shack!
What a great idea!

754
00:27:14,535 --> 00:27:18,405
<i>(WE NO SPEAK AMERICANO</i>
PLAYING AS RINGTONE)

755
00:27:25,679 --> 00:27:26,747
It's me.

756
00:27:28,882 --> 00:27:31,184
Wow, this club
is huge, Bill.

757
00:27:31,218 --> 00:27:32,386
The way
you were
describing it,

758
00:27:32,419 --> 00:27:34,454
I expected
a place where
they're serving

759
00:27:34,488 --> 00:27:36,490
grilled cheese
out of a little
window, you know.

760
00:27:36,523 --> 00:27:39,459
Yes, I suppose
they've fixed it up
over the years.

761
00:27:39,493 --> 00:27:41,762
But to us
it will
always be...

762
00:27:41,795 --> 00:27:43,297
BOTH: The Shack.

763
00:27:43,330 --> 00:27:45,465
This place was
built by slaves.

764
00:27:45,499 --> 00:27:46,633
Douglass.

765
00:27:46,667 --> 00:27:49,102
What, I'm not allowed
to tell the truth now?

766
00:27:49,136 --> 00:27:50,871
How are we supposed
to confront our problems

767
00:27:50,905 --> 00:27:53,007
if we don't
talk about it, Dad?

768
00:27:53,041 --> 00:27:54,474
No, it's true.
It's true.

769
00:27:54,508 --> 00:27:57,244
The... Some
of the history
down here is

770
00:27:57,277 --> 00:27:58,378
just...
it's brutal.

771
00:27:58,412 --> 00:28:00,781
Mmm.
It's just
unthinkable.

772
00:28:02,649 --> 00:28:04,418
It's not on the menu,
but you can order

773
00:28:04,451 --> 00:28:06,420
the club sandwich
with lobster.

774
00:28:06,453 --> 00:28:08,355
You know, I can't
even bring
my girlfriend here

775
00:28:08,388 --> 00:28:09,756
because
I'm ashamed.

776
00:28:11,325 --> 00:28:12,961
She's
an African person.

777
00:28:12,994 --> 00:28:16,463
She is a person
emailing you from Africa,

778
00:28:16,496 --> 00:28:19,067
and to whom
you are sending
back money.

779
00:28:19,099 --> 00:28:20,400
We have
yet to confirm

780
00:28:20,434 --> 00:28:23,004
whether she's
a girl or a friend.

781
00:28:23,037 --> 00:28:25,039
Keep me safe
from negative energy.

782
00:28:25,073 --> 00:28:26,873
Hi, everyone.
Welcome
to White Oak.

783
00:28:26,908 --> 00:28:29,810
What can
I get you guys?
Oh, no bread, please.

784
00:28:29,843 --> 00:28:33,047
Um, do you have
those crackers?
The seedy ones?

785
00:28:33,081 --> 00:28:35,415
Of course.
Gloria, do you
have kombucha?

786
00:28:35,449 --> 00:28:38,118
I can check.
Does anyone
want in on this?

787
00:28:38,151 --> 00:28:39,820
Ever since I've
had kombucha,

788
00:28:39,853 --> 00:28:42,789
my BMs have been
...completely regular.
BILL: Oh. All right.

789
00:28:42,823 --> 00:28:45,325
I've had no problems.
All right.
Remember, Douglass,

790
00:28:45,359 --> 00:28:47,962
we don't talk about
our BMs at the table.
No.

791
00:28:47,996 --> 00:28:49,796
Before I was
drinking kombucha,

792
00:28:50,263 --> 00:28:52,066
my feces looked like

793
00:28:52,100 --> 00:28:54,102
ripped,
little pieces
of paper

794
00:28:54,134 --> 00:28:55,569
and then after
I started drinking,

795
00:28:55,602 --> 00:28:57,437
they're long,
soft logs.
(BILL CHUCKLES)

796
00:28:57,471 --> 00:29:00,407
Well, all right.
Thank you for that.

797
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:02,476
Um, do you know
what you want,
Sebastian?

798
00:29:02,509 --> 00:29:04,444
Just a...

799
00:29:04,478 --> 00:29:06,680
the Cobb salad.
BILL: Good choice.

800
00:29:06,713 --> 00:29:08,482
What are you, one
of my sorority sisters?

801
00:29:08,515 --> 00:29:10,918
(CHUCKLING)
Is that all
you're gonna get?

802
00:29:10,952 --> 00:29:12,319
You're not
gonna get
a starter?

803
00:29:12,352 --> 00:29:14,221
Yeah, uh,
I'm just gonna

804
00:29:14,254 --> 00:29:15,422
stick with the middle
of the menu.

805
00:29:15,455 --> 00:29:17,257
ELLIE: All right,
suit yourself.

806
00:29:17,290 --> 00:29:18,592
Salvo, what are
you gonna get?

807
00:29:18,625 --> 00:29:20,995
Gloria, I think
I'm gonna have the...

808
00:29:21,029 --> 00:29:23,064
the BLT with
the onion rings.

809
00:29:23,097 --> 00:29:25,332
But what's
the price
on that dish?

810
00:29:25,832 --> 00:29:27,001
Oh, no, we don't...

811
00:29:27,035 --> 00:29:31,238
Salvo, this may
sound very silly

812
00:29:31,271 --> 00:29:33,007
but we don't
like to put
prices on things,

813
00:29:33,041 --> 00:29:38,046
because it's just
an annoying reminder
of money. Right?

814
00:29:38,079 --> 00:29:39,646
Oh! (CHUCKLES)

815
00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:41,448
So, everything's
for free, you mean?

816
00:29:41,481 --> 00:29:44,317
(CHUCKLES)
No. No, it is
not free.

817
00:29:44,351 --> 00:29:45,886
(LAUGHS)
I wish it were.

818
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:47,387
TIGGER: (LAUGHING)
Nothing is free.

819
00:29:47,421 --> 00:29:49,790
So, what do they do?
I mean, they make up
a price, or...

820
00:29:49,823 --> 00:29:51,324
Oh, Dad, it's...
you know...

821
00:29:51,358 --> 00:29:52,526
Son, I'm talking
to Bill, here.

822
00:29:52,559 --> 00:29:53,961
Are you Bill?
Hello, Bill.

823
00:29:53,995 --> 00:29:55,295
BILL: (CHUCKLING)
It's fine.

824
00:29:55,328 --> 00:29:56,931
Everything has
a set price.
Mmm.

825
00:29:56,964 --> 00:29:59,466
And then they just
tally it up at the
end of the week,

826
00:29:59,499 --> 00:30:01,903
put it on my bill,
and it's
taken care of.

827
00:30:01,936 --> 00:30:03,303
Got it.
Okay, got it.

828
00:30:03,336 --> 00:30:04,705
Well, Gloria,
I would just
love to chat

829
00:30:04,738 --> 00:30:06,339
with somebody
who knows
the prices.

830
00:30:06,373 --> 00:30:07,641
TIGGER:
Salvo, please.

831
00:30:07,674 --> 00:30:10,243
Please. It would
be our pleasure
to treat you.

832
00:30:10,277 --> 00:30:11,878
I would love that
and thank you, Tigger.

833
00:30:11,913 --> 00:30:14,614
But I think you do
way, way, way
too much, already.

834
00:30:14,648 --> 00:30:16,383
You're putting us
up in your home,

835
00:30:16,416 --> 00:30:18,953
that's enough already.
We want to at least,
you know, pay for the meal.

836
00:30:18,986 --> 00:30:20,721
It's not a big deal.
I know it's not
a big deal.

837
00:30:20,754 --> 00:30:22,222
Don't make
a big deal out
of it. It's all right.

838
00:30:22,255 --> 00:30:23,590
Don't worry
about it.
It's okay.

839
00:30:23,623 --> 00:30:25,692
So, Gloria,
just do me
a favor,

840
00:30:25,726 --> 00:30:27,294
find out how much
it is for the BLT.

841
00:30:27,327 --> 00:30:29,629
What did
you get again?
Just the Cobb salad.

842
00:30:29,663 --> 00:30:31,199
Cobb salad.
BILL: Please. Please,

843
00:30:31,231 --> 00:30:32,566
No, we'll take
care of it.
Just let us pay.

844
00:30:32,599 --> 00:30:33,867
It will be
so much easier...
Just let them pay.

845
00:30:33,900 --> 00:30:35,669
...if you just
let them pay.
I can't let you.

846
00:30:35,702 --> 00:30:38,405
...taken care of it.
Dad, let them pay.

847
00:30:38,438 --> 00:30:40,174
Please let them pay.
Just let us pay.

848
00:30:40,208 --> 00:30:42,342
I can't let you pay.
ELLIE: It's so easy.

849
00:30:46,613 --> 00:30:48,950
I don't know
what you're
so upset about.

850
00:30:48,983 --> 00:30:50,985
I mean, I'm
a working guy.

851
00:30:51,018 --> 00:30:52,186
I like to pay
my own way.

852
00:30:52,220 --> 00:30:53,453
I don't want
to owe anybody
anything.

853
00:30:53,487 --> 00:30:55,156
I'm upset because
you're supposed

854
00:30:55,189 --> 00:30:56,656
to be getting
to know Ellie's family.

855
00:30:56,690 --> 00:30:58,558
And instead,
you made a big scene.

856
00:30:58,592 --> 00:31:00,827
So what? Who cares?
These people are strange.

857
00:31:00,861 --> 00:31:02,063
Yeah, you think
they are.

858
00:31:02,096 --> 00:31:03,830
They are strange.
Are you kidding me?

859
00:31:03,864 --> 00:31:05,766
They wanna take
a break from thinking
about money.

860
00:31:05,799 --> 00:31:07,367
Where I come from,
that's called dying.

861
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:09,137
All right, that's...

862
00:31:09,170 --> 00:31:11,338
It's a different life.

863
00:31:11,371 --> 00:31:12,806
But you still
gotta try.

864
00:31:13,507 --> 00:31:14,541
Try...

865
00:31:14,574 --> 00:31:16,210
I just don't
know, Sebastian,
I got to tell you.

866
00:31:16,244 --> 00:31:18,146
I don't know
how you're
gonna fit in.

867
00:31:18,179 --> 00:31:19,679
It ain't normal. I mean,
your mother and me,

868
00:31:19,713 --> 00:31:21,381
we didn't
raise you
this way, so...

869
00:31:21,414 --> 00:31:23,350
Yeah, you raised me
to marry an Italian

870
00:31:23,383 --> 00:31:24,851
who shouts
when she's happy,

871
00:31:24,885 --> 00:31:26,486
and grows hair
in places I didn't
even know could grow.

872
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:28,189
So what? That's
a real woman.

873
00:31:28,222 --> 00:31:29,589
Your mother was a real woman,

874
00:31:29,623 --> 00:31:31,358
who put real food
on the table,

875
00:31:31,391 --> 00:31:34,128
not somebody
who refuses
a bread basket.

876
00:31:34,162 --> 00:31:35,462
All right, Dad,
even I have to admit

877
00:31:35,495 --> 00:31:37,697
the crackers were awful.
It's like
eating birdseed.

878
00:31:37,731 --> 00:31:39,432
Yeah. I didn't know
whether to eat 'em
with my hands

879
00:31:39,466 --> 00:31:40,600
or just walk
around and...

880
00:31:40,634 --> 00:31:44,337
(MIMICKING
CHICKEN CLUCKING)

881
00:31:44,371 --> 00:31:46,240
Exactly, and you notice
how they try to downplay

882
00:31:46,274 --> 00:31:47,474
how fancy it is?

883
00:31:47,507 --> 00:31:48,842
Oh, yeah.
"Excuse me?

884
00:31:48,875 --> 00:31:49,944
"I'm looking at this.

885
00:31:49,977 --> 00:31:52,345
"Excuse me.
I got eyes.
I can see. Hello."

886
00:31:52,379 --> 00:31:53,747
They walk around,
saying, "Oh, yes.

887
00:31:53,780 --> 00:31:56,250
"The house is
60,000 square feet,

888
00:31:56,284 --> 00:31:57,551
"with 13 bedrooms,

889
00:31:57,584 --> 00:31:59,853
"but we like it
because it's cozy."

890
00:31:59,886 --> 00:32:01,822
And then they do
the opposite
with the furniture.

891
00:32:01,855 --> 00:32:03,356
They make it sound
more important

892
00:32:03,390 --> 00:32:04,591
than it really is.

893
00:32:04,624 --> 00:32:06,493
It can't just be
like a regular chair.

894
00:32:06,526 --> 00:32:08,262
It's got to have like
a whole back story.

895
00:32:08,296 --> 00:32:09,429
Oh, yeah.
I mean, what...

896
00:32:09,462 --> 00:32:11,565
"This is the chair
Thomas Jefferson sat in

897
00:32:11,598 --> 00:32:13,800
"when he signed
the treaty of
Who-the-Hell-Cares?"

898
00:32:13,834 --> 00:32:16,503
"Well, the toilet is where
Abe Lincoln took a dump.

899
00:32:16,536 --> 00:32:17,905
"There's a plaque
right there."

900
00:32:17,939 --> 00:32:20,540
"Oh, do they got a place
for his hat in there, too?"

901
00:32:20,574 --> 00:32:22,043
I mean, I don't know
if I'm in a house

902
00:32:22,076 --> 00:32:23,510
or I'm in a museum.

903
00:32:24,377 --> 00:32:26,948
So, tell us,
what's new
in Chicago?

904
00:32:26,981 --> 00:32:28,548
How's the art?

905
00:32:28,582 --> 00:32:31,219
Well, it's, um...
Yes?

906
00:32:31,252 --> 00:32:32,686
It's great.
Yes.

907
00:32:32,719 --> 00:32:34,621
All my pieces
from my last show

908
00:32:34,654 --> 00:32:36,890
sold out at the opening.
I mean...

909
00:32:36,924 --> 00:32:39,126
Well, that's
something...
That's amazing!

910
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:40,460
...to crow about.
Yeah, right?

911
00:32:40,493 --> 00:32:43,331
So, now that
you're getting
all these contacts,

912
00:32:43,363 --> 00:32:46,200
you could probably
work from anywhere.

913
00:32:46,234 --> 00:32:49,769
Mom, stop, no.
Right, sweetie?
Right?

914
00:32:49,803 --> 00:32:51,838
Sebastian and I
love living
in Chicago.

915
00:32:51,872 --> 00:32:53,207
BOTH: Oh.

916
00:32:53,241 --> 00:32:55,709
But we miss
having you
there in D.C.

917
00:32:55,742 --> 00:32:58,112
We really do.
We really do.
We do.

918
00:32:58,145 --> 00:32:59,347
These cheeks
aren't as fun

919
00:32:59,379 --> 00:33:00,647
to kiss
on FaceTime.

920
00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:02,083
Oh, my God.
I want a cheek, too.

921
00:33:02,116 --> 00:33:03,416
Where's my cheek?
Where's my cheek?

922
00:33:03,450 --> 00:33:06,653
(ELLIE LAUGHING AWKWARDLY)
Excuse me. Excuse me.

923
00:33:06,686 --> 00:33:08,256
You guys aren't supposed
to be talking

924
00:33:08,289 --> 00:33:09,456
during a sound bath.
Oh, God.

925
00:33:09,489 --> 00:33:11,325
Oh, of course.
Sorry. Sorry,
Dougie.

926
00:33:11,359 --> 00:33:12,525
No. No, this is...
Sorry, sorry,
sorry.

927
00:33:12,559 --> 00:33:13,928
This is
wonderful.

928
00:33:13,961 --> 00:33:17,098
Please keep
bathing us
in sound.

929
00:33:17,131 --> 00:33:19,000
Yes.
Go, with
your... Yeah.

930
00:33:19,033 --> 00:33:22,069
Dad, listen. We're here
because I wanna marry Ellie.

931
00:33:22,103 --> 00:33:24,471
So, it don't matter
how it works
with these people.

932
00:33:24,504 --> 00:33:25,805
It works with her.

933
00:33:25,839 --> 00:33:27,741
So, come on.
Tomorrow, please,

934
00:33:27,774 --> 00:33:29,743
can you give
these people
a chance?

935
00:33:29,776 --> 00:33:32,812
Got it. Got it.
No problem, no problem.

936
00:33:32,846 --> 00:33:35,149
Because at the end
of the day, son,
it's your life.

937
00:33:36,616 --> 00:33:38,152
Night cologne?
Yep.

938
00:33:46,394 --> 00:33:48,495
Look at this.
Pink sheets?

939
00:33:48,528 --> 00:33:49,763
SALVO: What?

940
00:33:51,198 --> 00:33:52,632
Well, we're
in a dollhouse.

941
00:33:52,666 --> 00:33:54,168
(SEBASTIAN CHUCKLES)

942
00:33:56,304 --> 00:33:58,571
Mom, Dad,
I would love

943
00:33:58,605 --> 00:34:00,473
to live closer,
you know that.

944
00:34:00,507 --> 00:34:02,575
And?
But...

945
00:34:02,609 --> 00:34:04,844
Sebastian has
his dad,

946
00:34:04,878 --> 00:34:07,081
and a great job.
Yeah, working

947
00:34:07,114 --> 00:34:08,481
for the damn Hiltons.

948
00:34:08,515 --> 00:34:09,816
(WHISPERING)
The Hiltons.
Such a good gig.

949
00:34:09,849 --> 00:34:11,584
Do you still have
to have herpes to work there?

950
00:34:11,618 --> 00:34:13,955
The point is...
Thank you
for that.

951
00:34:13,988 --> 00:34:16,656
...that he loves it,

952
00:34:16,690 --> 00:34:18,960
and I couldn't
just ask him
to leave.

953
00:34:18,993 --> 00:34:21,561
Sure, but that house
that you guys live in,

954
00:34:21,594 --> 00:34:24,165
it's so cramped.
We prefer "modest."

955
00:34:24,198 --> 00:34:26,733
You don't go
on vacations.
Because we're working.

956
00:34:26,766 --> 00:34:28,035
LUCKY: And
all that cologne?

957
00:34:28,069 --> 00:34:30,204
They made my chopper smell
like a Nordstrom's.

958
00:34:30,237 --> 00:34:31,538
God! I hate it

959
00:34:31,571 --> 00:34:34,442
when you guys
gang up on me
like this.

960
00:34:34,474 --> 00:34:36,710
It's not fair!
And like it or not,

961
00:34:37,111 --> 00:34:38,179
Mom, Dad,

962
00:34:39,313 --> 00:34:40,547
and Lucky...
Ow!

963
00:34:40,580 --> 00:34:42,749
Sebastian and I are
very happy together,

964
00:34:42,782 --> 00:34:45,086
and we're staying
in Chicago.
(GASPS)

965
00:34:45,119 --> 00:34:46,553
I'm sorry, Dougie.

966
00:34:46,586 --> 00:34:48,688
Okay. I can't open
chakras like this.

967
00:34:48,722 --> 00:34:50,557
I'm gonna go
call my girlfriend.

968
00:34:50,590 --> 00:34:53,027
(SOBBING) Oh, no!
It's fine.
It's fine.

969
00:34:53,060 --> 00:34:54,494
LUCKY: Oh, shit!

970
00:34:55,229 --> 00:34:56,563
Bitcoin's down.

971
00:34:58,132 --> 00:34:59,033
(PEACOCK SQUAWKS)

972
00:34:59,066 --> 00:35:00,900
Will you look at us?
Walking through

973
00:35:00,935 --> 00:35:04,372
a gated community
as guests.

974
00:35:04,405 --> 00:35:05,672
Not groundskeepers.

975
00:35:05,705 --> 00:35:07,341
Yeah. Well,
I just hope

976
00:35:07,375 --> 00:35:08,775
nothing gets stolen
this weekend,

977
00:35:08,808 --> 00:35:11,078
'cause these people
love to blame
the immigrants.

978
00:35:12,313 --> 00:35:13,513
Look at this one.
Look at this one.

979
00:35:13,546 --> 00:35:15,648
What'd she do?
Take the gym
equipment home?

980
00:35:15,682 --> 00:35:16,917
Morning!
Hello.

981
00:35:16,951 --> 00:35:18,452
Beautiful day,
isn't it?
Yeah.

982
00:35:18,486 --> 00:35:20,221
Beautiful.
Yeah. Yeah.

983
00:35:20,254 --> 00:35:22,456
You gotta be kidding me.
What the hell's her problem?

984
00:35:22,490 --> 00:35:24,058
"Beautiful day."
Give me a break.

985
00:35:24,091 --> 00:35:25,326
She's happy, Dad.

986
00:35:25,359 --> 00:35:28,362
She probably had
a father that let her
sleep in past 5:45.

987
00:35:28,396 --> 00:35:29,562
I mean, I can't
stop thinking

988
00:35:29,596 --> 00:35:30,897
about how much work
I'm missing.

989
00:35:30,931 --> 00:35:32,400
I could've done
four dyes
and a perm by now.

990
00:35:32,433 --> 00:35:34,567
Two electric bills
I could've paid. Two.
(BELL RINGING)

991
00:35:34,601 --> 00:35:36,270
Good morning.
Hello.

992
00:35:37,405 --> 00:35:39,006
(MOCKINGLY)
"Good morning."
Come on.

993
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,409
What you talking about?
She's in a bathrobe.
I can't believe this.

994
00:35:41,442 --> 00:35:43,210
I mean, don't
these people
have jobs?

995
00:35:43,244 --> 00:35:44,611
It's a holiday weekend.

996
00:35:44,644 --> 00:35:46,846
Plus, they got
their money in
the stock market.

997
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:50,184
Not mayonnaise jars
buried in their backyard.

998
00:35:50,217 --> 00:35:52,286
Just relax.
Come on, Dad.

999
00:35:52,319 --> 00:35:55,089
(EXAGGERATING)
It's a beautiful day!

1000
00:35:58,392 --> 00:35:59,726
(GRUNTS)

1001
00:36:00,860 --> 00:36:02,396
(GRUNTS)

1002
00:36:02,430 --> 00:36:04,365
SALVO: Back and forth,
back and forth.

1003
00:36:04,398 --> 00:36:07,101
You play this game?
Come on.
(PLAYERS CONTINUE GRUNTING)

1004
00:36:07,134 --> 00:36:08,135
The outfits?

1005
00:36:08,169 --> 00:36:10,071
The wives
with their <i>culos</i>
hanging out

1006
00:36:10,104 --> 00:36:11,704
for everybody
to see?

1007
00:36:11,738 --> 00:36:13,107
And when
they hit a ball,
it sounds like

1008
00:36:13,140 --> 00:36:14,674
they're having
an orgasm. They're
hitting a ball.

1009
00:36:15,875 --> 00:36:17,945
Come on. The only reason
I agreed to play is

1010
00:36:17,978 --> 00:36:19,846
so you could spend
some time with Bill.

1011
00:36:19,879 --> 00:36:21,581
So just relax
and do what
we came to do.

1012
00:36:21,614 --> 00:36:22,782
Yeah, I am
relaxed.

1013
00:36:22,816 --> 00:36:24,584
Look, I got
sandals on.

1014
00:36:25,052 --> 00:36:26,253
I'm relaxed.

1015
00:36:26,287 --> 00:36:28,655
You look like
the guy who killed
John Wick's dog.

1016
00:36:28,688 --> 00:36:30,357
Who's that?
I don't even
know who that is.

1017
00:36:31,258 --> 00:36:32,659
(SIGHS)

1018
00:36:32,692 --> 00:36:34,794
TIGGER: So Ellie tells me
you're quite the player.

1019
00:36:34,828 --> 00:36:36,530
Yeah, I've taken
a couple lessons.

1020
00:36:36,564 --> 00:36:38,199
Well, get ready
to bring it.

1021
00:36:38,232 --> 00:36:40,434
I love my family
everywhere,

1022
00:36:40,468 --> 00:36:42,702
except on
the tennis court.

1023
00:36:42,735 --> 00:36:43,938
Chest-bump!
Oh, wow!

1024
00:36:43,971 --> 00:36:46,373
Oh, jeez, that's
uncomfortable.

1025
00:36:46,407 --> 00:36:48,275
Let's do this.
Mom, you ready?

1026
00:36:49,376 --> 00:36:50,777
(MOUTHING)

1027
00:36:56,584 --> 00:36:58,219
LUCKY: It's time
for tennis, baby!

1028
00:36:58,252 --> 00:36:59,553
(LUCKY GRUNTS)
(HITS BALL)

1029
00:36:59,587 --> 00:37:01,489
So, hey,
Bill...
Yeah?

1030
00:37:01,522 --> 00:37:03,591
So how long
you been in the
hotel business?

1031
00:37:03,623 --> 00:37:05,593
Oh, yes, well,
50 years.

1032
00:37:05,625 --> 00:37:08,028
A long time.
My whole life.
Yeah.

1033
00:37:08,996 --> 00:37:10,331
But then it's...

1034
00:37:10,364 --> 00:37:12,799
I guess it's
a pretty exciting
thing to do.

1035
00:37:12,832 --> 00:37:14,602
I love it. I love it.
I got... I got hotel...

1036
00:37:14,634 --> 00:37:16,703
I got... I got
hotels in
my blood.

1037
00:37:16,736 --> 00:37:18,339
Just like
you have hair
in your blood.

1038
00:37:18,372 --> 00:37:19,706
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
Right? I mean...

1039
00:37:19,739 --> 00:37:22,709
Yo, Sea Bass.
Hope you got on
your oven mitts.

1040
00:37:22,742 --> 00:37:24,345
'Cause here comes the heat.

1041
00:37:24,378 --> 00:37:26,413
(GRUNTS)
Oh. (GRUNTS)

1042
00:37:26,447 --> 00:37:29,049
LUCKY: Oh, my God!
SEBASTIAN: Sorry.

1043
00:37:29,083 --> 00:37:30,717
What the hell was
that, Sebastian?

1044
00:37:30,750 --> 00:37:32,652
Ellie told me you had game.

1045
00:37:32,685 --> 00:37:34,121
Sorry.
BILL: Didn't
come easy.

1046
00:37:34,155 --> 00:37:36,023
I got, uh,
kicked out
of Harvard

1047
00:37:36,056 --> 00:37:37,857
for playing
the sax. I know,
it's a long story.

1048
00:37:37,891 --> 00:37:39,593
But my dad,
he got mad.
He said,

1049
00:37:39,627 --> 00:37:41,395
"That's it.
You make it
on your own."

1050
00:37:41,428 --> 00:37:44,031
He gave me
one hotel. One.

1051
00:37:44,064 --> 00:37:45,099
Wow.
Yeah.

1052
00:37:45,132 --> 00:37:46,833
That's
impressive.
Well...

1053
00:37:47,201 --> 00:37:48,735
(CHUCKLES)

1054
00:37:48,768 --> 00:37:50,371
My father
gave me
a mule.

1055
00:37:51,172 --> 00:37:52,439
Next day
it died.

1056
00:37:55,142 --> 00:37:56,243
(GRUNTS) Gah!

1057
00:37:56,277 --> 00:37:59,046
♪ <i>Put the macaroni</i>
<i>in the pot and cook it♪</i>

1058
00:37:59,079 --> 00:38:01,115
(TRILLING)

1059
00:38:01,681 --> 00:38:03,050
What's
that, Doug?

1060
00:38:03,083 --> 00:38:05,019
It's an adult
coloring book.

1061
00:38:08,289 --> 00:38:09,856
LUCKY: Hey,
man, you wanna
take a break

1062
00:38:09,889 --> 00:38:12,526
for some more water
or some more
tennis lessons?

1063
00:38:12,560 --> 00:38:15,229
(LAUGHING)

1064
00:38:15,262 --> 00:38:17,431
What is going on?

1065
00:38:17,464 --> 00:38:18,698
What?
You love tennis,

1066
00:38:18,731 --> 00:38:20,034
and it's like
you're not even
trying out here.

1067
00:38:20,067 --> 00:38:21,602
Come on, it's
just a game.

1068
00:38:21,635 --> 00:38:22,970
Well...
(SIGHS)

1069
00:38:23,003 --> 00:38:24,271
All right.
At least
take off

1070
00:38:24,305 --> 00:38:25,805
this stupid
tracksuit.
No, it's cold.

1071
00:38:25,838 --> 00:38:27,107
Leave it on.
Leave it on.
You must be sweating...

1072
00:38:27,141 --> 00:38:28,708
No, I'm cold.
I'm cold.
...your tits off!

1073
00:38:28,741 --> 00:38:30,411
You're not cold.

1074
00:38:32,346 --> 00:38:34,781
Wait a sec. Are you
embarrassed to play

1075
00:38:34,814 --> 00:38:36,016
because your dad
is watching?

1076
00:38:36,050 --> 00:38:37,451
Listen, he's not
the biggest fan

1077
00:38:37,484 --> 00:38:38,718
of sports like this.

1078
00:38:38,751 --> 00:38:40,421
And I don't
really feel like
going over there

1079
00:38:40,454 --> 00:38:41,655
and explaining to him

1080
00:38:41,689 --> 00:38:43,657
that I'm paying a guy
to teach me how to play.

1081
00:38:43,691 --> 00:38:45,693
Well, you should know
that my mother is not

1082
00:38:45,725 --> 00:38:48,728
a "big fan"
of losing either.

1083
00:38:50,698 --> 00:38:53,234
Yeah.
(GRUNTS)

1084
00:38:53,267 --> 00:38:55,636
Listen, at least
she stopped
chest-bumping me.

1085
00:38:55,669 --> 00:38:58,239
The only breasts
I wanna feel in
this family are yours.

1086
00:38:59,206 --> 00:39:00,507
Not if you lose.

1087
00:39:01,642 --> 00:39:03,510
Sebastian,
did Ellie
ever tell you

1088
00:39:03,544 --> 00:39:04,744
about the guy
she dated,

1089
00:39:04,777 --> 00:39:07,548
during her semester
abroad in Scotland?

1090
00:39:07,581 --> 00:39:09,782
Is that
Andy-frickin'-Murray?

1091
00:39:09,816 --> 00:39:12,653
Never lost
a match with him
on my team.

1092
00:39:12,686 --> 00:39:14,021
I wonder what
he's up to.

1093
00:39:14,054 --> 00:39:15,656
LUCKY: Hey, you know what?
I'll play with my weak hand.

1094
00:39:15,689 --> 00:39:18,125
That way
you guys have,
like, a shot.

1095
00:39:18,158 --> 00:39:19,759
(LAUGHS)

1096
00:39:19,792 --> 00:39:21,095
Is that cool, Mom?

1097
00:39:21,128 --> 00:39:23,297
SEBASTIAN: <i>Until then,</i>
<i>my nightmare had been</i>

1098
00:39:23,330 --> 00:39:26,367
<i>letting my father</i>
<i>see me enjoy this life.</i>

1099
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:35,042
<i>So, much like the kick serve</i>

1100
00:39:35,075 --> 00:39:38,746
<i>I learned from a Swedish pro</i>
<i>named Johannes,</i>

1101
00:39:38,778 --> 00:39:40,681
<i>this would be the point</i>

1102
00:39:40,714 --> 00:39:42,082
<i>of no return.</i>

1103
00:39:42,116 --> 00:39:45,519
<i>(CON TE PARTIRO</i>
BY ANDREA BOCELLI PLAYING)

1104
00:39:45,552 --> 00:39:46,920
TIGGER: Ooh!

1105
00:39:58,999 --> 00:40:01,969
(STRIKING TENNIS BALL)

1106
00:40:21,588 --> 00:40:22,990
Oh, no.

1107
00:40:23,390 --> 00:40:24,658
You see this?

1108
00:40:24,692 --> 00:40:27,328
(DISTORTED) Crud!
(DISTORTED) I am calm!

1109
00:40:27,361 --> 00:40:28,562
Serve!

1110
00:40:31,165 --> 00:40:33,233
This a game
you can
pick up fast?

1111
00:40:34,535 --> 00:40:35,835
Not at this level.

1112
00:40:41,342 --> 00:40:42,176
BILL: My, my.

1113
00:40:42,209 --> 00:40:44,844
Sebastian,
he's got game.

1114
00:40:44,877 --> 00:40:46,380
You must be
very proud.

1115
00:40:47,481 --> 00:40:50,084
(OPERA MUSIC CONTINUES)

1116
00:40:55,489 --> 00:41:00,394
(DISTORTED GROANING)

1117
00:41:03,764 --> 00:41:05,766
Lucky! Are
you okay?

1118
00:41:05,799 --> 00:41:07,034
No, I'm not okay.

1119
00:41:07,067 --> 00:41:08,969
(GASPS)
So sorry, Luck.

1120
00:41:09,002 --> 00:41:11,105
Oh, that's okay,
Sebastian.

1121
00:41:11,138 --> 00:41:12,673
I'm sure it was
an accident.

1122
00:41:12,706 --> 00:41:13,774
ELLIE: Oh, my God.

1123
00:41:13,807 --> 00:41:15,209
Quick! Bill!

1124
00:41:15,242 --> 00:41:18,579
Get a small cup
of ice water
for his testes.

1125
00:41:18,612 --> 00:41:19,747
BILL: Here.
LUCKY: What?

1126
00:41:19,780 --> 00:41:21,081
I'm way
ahead of you,
sweetheart.

1127
00:41:21,115 --> 00:41:22,349
LUCKY: No, no, no. no.
Here, this
is ice tea.

1128
00:41:22,383 --> 00:41:23,584
It's not gonna hurt.
Easy, son.
Rest easy.

1129
00:41:23,617 --> 00:41:24,852
Nice and cool.
We're gonna cool

1130
00:41:24,884 --> 00:41:26,520
my future
grandbabies.
Stop what you're doing!

1131
00:41:26,553 --> 00:41:28,088
No, no, no.
No, no, no.
Do you want me

1132
00:41:28,122 --> 00:41:29,223
to squeeze one,
sweetie...
Take these. Hold these.

1133
00:41:29,256 --> 00:41:30,357
...just to feel
how it is?
Trust me.

1134
00:41:30,391 --> 00:41:32,092
LUCKY: Don't touch.
TIGGER: Oh, okay.

1135
00:41:32,126 --> 00:41:33,360
SALVO: <i>When did</i>
<i>you learn to play tennis</i>
<i>like that, anyway?</i>

1136
00:41:33,394 --> 00:41:35,996
I took a few lessons
for Ellie, all right?

1137
00:41:36,029 --> 00:41:37,064
It's not that big
of a deal.

1138
00:41:37,097 --> 00:41:38,399
So how much
this cost you?

1139
00:41:38,432 --> 00:41:40,300
SEBASTIAN: <i>To all</i>
<i>the immigrant kids watching,</i>

1140
00:41:40,334 --> 00:41:42,469
<i>you know when</i>
<i>you get that question,</i>

1141
00:41:42,503 --> 00:41:44,538
<i>you always give them</i>
<i>the parent price.</i>

1142
00:41:44,571 --> 00:41:45,606
Uh, $40.

1143
00:41:45,639 --> 00:41:46,974
Forty? You're
telling me

1144
00:41:47,007 --> 00:41:48,041
you paid the price

1145
00:41:48,075 --> 00:41:49,176
of a long hair blowout

1146
00:41:49,209 --> 00:41:51,512
for somebody
to teach you
a game?

1147
00:41:51,545 --> 00:41:52,846
I mean,
what am
I gonna say?

1148
00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:55,182
SEBASTIAN: <i>Now, just imagine</i>
<i>how he'd react if I told him</i>

1149
00:41:55,215 --> 00:41:57,217
<i>the actual price was 80.</i>

1150
00:41:57,251 --> 00:41:59,987
Next thing I know,
you'll be serving me
the bird crackers.

1151
00:42:00,020 --> 00:42:01,288
(MIMICKING
FEEDING A BIRD)

1152
00:42:01,321 --> 00:42:03,323
Son, serve me
the bird crackers.
Come on.

1153
00:42:04,024 --> 00:42:05,826
It's a hobby, Dad.

1154
00:42:05,859 --> 00:42:07,728
A lot of people have
them, all right?

1155
00:42:07,761 --> 00:42:09,062
Stop acting
like I'm
joining a cult.

1156
00:42:09,096 --> 00:42:10,130
Well, it is a cult.

1157
00:42:10,164 --> 00:42:11,565
Only instead
of Kool-Aid,

1158
00:42:11,598 --> 00:42:12,699
they're serving
champagne.

1159
00:42:12,733 --> 00:42:14,935
(ALL CHEERING)
BILL: Mmm.

1160
00:42:16,737 --> 00:42:17,771
Welcome,
everyone,

1161
00:42:17,805 --> 00:42:18,839
to the
<i>S.S. Collins.</i>

1162
00:42:18,872 --> 00:42:21,675
Uh, fun fact.
I won this boat,

1163
00:42:21,708 --> 00:42:22,943
playing
backgammon

1164
00:42:22,976 --> 00:42:24,244
with Sir Richard Branson.

1165
00:42:24,278 --> 00:42:26,780
So for us,
every voyage is
a Virgin one.

1166
00:42:26,814 --> 00:42:28,449
(CHUCKLING)

1167
00:42:28,482 --> 00:42:29,616
Good one, sir.
Thanks.

1168
00:42:29,650 --> 00:42:31,151
Now, Bill and I
have been talking,

1169
00:42:31,185 --> 00:42:33,787
and we were
going to wait

1170
00:42:33,821 --> 00:42:35,322
until the weekend
to do this,

1171
00:42:35,355 --> 00:42:37,691
but, um,
now we're just
too excited.

1172
00:42:37,724 --> 00:42:39,827
All right.
Uh, Sebastian,

1173
00:42:39,860 --> 00:42:42,262
as a lifelong
hotelier,

1174
00:42:42,296 --> 00:42:44,765
and the father
of the most
wonderful girl

1175
00:42:44,798 --> 00:42:46,266
in the world...
I love you.

1176
00:42:46,300 --> 00:42:48,335
...I have to say,
it just killed me...

1177
00:42:48,368 --> 00:42:50,604
killed...
Kills us.
Kills us. Yes.

1178
00:42:50,637 --> 00:42:51,805
We are dead,

1179
00:42:51,839 --> 00:42:54,141
thinking that
you are working

1180
00:42:54,174 --> 00:42:55,910
for our
biggest
competitor.

1181
00:42:55,944 --> 00:42:57,611
So...
Go on.

1182
00:42:57,644 --> 00:42:58,712
Shall I?
Yes.

1183
00:42:58,745 --> 00:43:00,180
Right now?
Please do.

1184
00:43:00,214 --> 00:43:01,982
BILL: Okay.
Daddy,
what is it?

1185
00:43:02,015 --> 00:43:05,352
On behalf
of the Collins
Hotel group,

1186
00:43:05,385 --> 00:43:07,221
I would love you
to join our side

1187
00:43:07,254 --> 00:43:09,289
and become
the new face

1188
00:43:09,323 --> 00:43:12,226
of the luxurious
five-star experience,

1189
00:43:12,259 --> 00:43:14,161
that is...
drum roll,

1190
00:43:14,194 --> 00:43:16,797
(VOCALIZING
DRUM ROLL)

1191
00:43:16,830 --> 00:43:18,098
The Barrymore Hotel.

1192
00:43:18,131 --> 00:43:19,166
Go on. Yeah.
(ELLIE AND
TIGGER GASP)

1193
00:43:19,199 --> 00:43:20,300
(TIGGER CHEERING)
Not kidding.

1194
00:43:20,334 --> 00:43:22,202
SEBASTIAN: What?
Are you serious?

1195
00:43:22,236 --> 00:43:23,537
BILL: Not kidding.
Very serious.

1196
00:43:23,570 --> 00:43:25,272
SEBASTIAN: This is
your signature property.

1197
00:43:25,305 --> 00:43:27,074
The most
prestigious hotel
in D.C.

1198
00:43:27,107 --> 00:43:28,275
Yeah,
it better be.
We just spent

1199
00:43:28,308 --> 00:43:30,444
$240 million
restoring it.

1200
00:43:30,477 --> 00:43:33,247
Uh, Dad, I thought
you were saving
that job for me.

1201
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:34,983
We regularly drug test.

1202
00:43:35,015 --> 00:43:37,050
Oh. Okay then.

1203
00:43:37,084 --> 00:43:39,119
Mom, Dad,
this is
so generous.

1204
00:43:39,152 --> 00:43:40,454
TIGGER: We
wouldn't do this

1205
00:43:40,487 --> 00:43:43,190
if we didn't think
he was perfect
for the job.

1206
00:43:43,223 --> 00:43:45,192
Come on, let's
go get some
more champagne.

1207
00:43:45,225 --> 00:43:46,260
Let's take a look.
I mean...

1208
00:43:46,293 --> 00:43:47,494
Let's take
a look at...
What?

1209
00:43:47,528 --> 00:43:48,862
...what you're...
I can't
believe this.

1210
00:43:48,896 --> 00:43:49,998
...going to be
the new manager of.

1211
00:43:50,030 --> 00:43:51,498
Now this was
built in 1896.

1212
00:43:51,532 --> 00:43:53,367
It's been
completely
restored,

1213
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:56,036
down to the dings
and the doorknobs.

1214
00:43:56,069 --> 00:43:57,538
(BOTH CHUCKLING)

1215
00:43:57,571 --> 00:43:59,540
BILL: Take a look.
No, they're all...
Everything.

1216
00:43:59,573 --> 00:44:02,142
Hey, uh, Doug,
what are you doing?

1217
00:44:02,175 --> 00:44:04,478
Just getting
the blood flowing.

1218
00:44:05,512 --> 00:44:07,114
Your face is
getting a little red.

1219
00:44:07,681 --> 00:44:09,583
Yeah, I... I feel dizzy.

1220
00:44:10,450 --> 00:44:12,052
Yeah, me, too.

1221
00:44:12,085 --> 00:44:14,154
Oh, that's the
Jackie Onassis
boardroom.

1222
00:44:14,187 --> 00:44:16,423
She was never there,
but we wish she would
have been.

1223
00:44:16,456 --> 00:44:17,992
(BOTH CHUCKLING)

1224
00:44:18,026 --> 00:44:20,360
This painting
in the lobby
here looks...

1225
00:44:20,394 --> 00:44:23,897
Yes, we... There's art.
Oh, we have... Yes.

1226
00:44:23,932 --> 00:44:25,299
This painting
in the board room.

1227
00:44:25,332 --> 00:44:27,501
Yeah, there's
a painting.
I recognize that sunset.

1228
00:44:27,534 --> 00:44:29,870
Wait a minute.
Did you buy
Ellie's paintings?

1229
00:44:29,904 --> 00:44:32,205
Does she know?
We bought a few

1230
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:34,074
through this designer
that we know,

1231
00:44:34,107 --> 00:44:35,509
it's no big deal.

1232
00:44:35,542 --> 00:44:38,913
We're supporting
our baby's dream.

1233
00:44:38,947 --> 00:44:41,114
Let's close this.
(TIGGER CHUCKLING)

1234
00:44:41,148 --> 00:44:42,349
A little champagne.

1235
00:44:42,382 --> 00:44:44,151
Oh, good.
I'll have some.
I'll have some.

1236
00:44:44,184 --> 00:44:45,686
ELLIE: Excuse me, Daddy.

1237
00:44:47,754 --> 00:44:49,523
So, what are
you thinking?

1238
00:44:49,556 --> 00:44:51,525
Yeah, well, Bill,
that's a very
generous offer,

1239
00:44:51,558 --> 00:44:54,494
but Sebastian
obviously has to
think about that.

1240
00:44:54,528 --> 00:44:55,395
Right?

1241
00:44:55,429 --> 00:44:57,097
Yeah.
Absolutely, Dad.
Yeah.

1242
00:44:57,130 --> 00:44:59,333
Of course.
This would be

1243
00:44:59,366 --> 00:45:00,901
a big move
for everyone,

1244
00:45:00,935 --> 00:45:03,637
so please,
take your time.

1245
00:45:03,670 --> 00:45:04,771
Talk it over.
Right.

1246
00:45:04,805 --> 00:45:06,740
And then tell us
what day to send
the moving trucks.

1247
00:45:06,773 --> 00:45:08,275
(TIGGER LAUGHING)

1248
00:45:08,308 --> 00:45:10,243
Dad.
(ALL LAUGHING)

1249
00:45:10,277 --> 00:45:13,180
Oh, this is
so cool!
So cool!

1250
00:45:13,213 --> 00:45:14,848
Hey, as
a possible member

1251
00:45:14,881 --> 00:45:17,818
of our, um,
family company,

1252
00:45:17,851 --> 00:45:20,054
how about we celebrate with
a little jet-booting, huh?

1253
00:45:20,088 --> 00:45:21,888
Oh, that sounds
great, man.
Count me in.

1254
00:45:21,923 --> 00:45:23,457
What's jet-booting?

1255
00:45:24,791 --> 00:45:27,260
Whoo! Whoa!

1256
00:45:27,294 --> 00:45:29,363
This is amazing, Lucky!

1257
00:45:29,396 --> 00:45:30,999
All right! Look at you.

1258
00:45:31,032 --> 00:45:33,166
Baby, you're doing so good!

1259
00:45:33,200 --> 00:45:35,535
I feel like I'm flying! Whoa!

1260
00:45:35,569 --> 00:45:37,571
Use your core!
I'm actually smiling.

1261
00:45:37,604 --> 00:45:39,974
(ELLIE CHEERING)
This smile is real.

1262
00:45:40,008 --> 00:45:41,141
(ELLIE CHEERING)

1263
00:45:41,174 --> 00:45:42,409
Salvo, would
you like

1264
00:45:42,442 --> 00:45:44,244
to borrow some
swim trunks?

1265
00:45:44,277 --> 00:45:46,080
We have
a hot tub
upstairs.

1266
00:45:46,114 --> 00:45:47,781
I'm fine.
I'm trying
to watch him.

1267
00:45:47,814 --> 00:45:49,383
Oh.
Make sure
he's okay.

1268
00:45:50,550 --> 00:45:52,152
Hey... (SIGHS)

1269
00:45:52,185 --> 00:45:53,988
I just wanted
to thank you

1270
00:45:54,022 --> 00:45:57,125
for looking
after Ellie
in Chicago.

1271
00:45:57,157 --> 00:45:59,826
We feel so lucky
she's met your son.

1272
00:45:59,860 --> 00:46:01,428
Well, he's a good kid. Thanks.

1273
00:46:01,461 --> 00:46:02,796
(FAINTLY) I'm king
of the world!

1274
00:46:02,829 --> 00:46:04,631
(CHUCKLES)
Always out making
an ass of himself.

1275
00:46:04,665 --> 00:46:06,366
(LAUGHING)

1276
00:46:07,434 --> 00:46:09,202
I know
you guys are close,

1277
00:46:09,236 --> 00:46:12,539
so if they do
end up in D.C.,

1278
00:46:12,572 --> 00:46:15,575
I promise we will
take good care of him.

1279
00:46:15,609 --> 00:46:17,177
Honestly, I wouldn't
get your hopes up.

1280
00:46:17,210 --> 00:46:20,081
I can't imagine Sebastian
ever leaving Chicago or me.

1281
00:46:20,114 --> 00:46:21,648
'Cause I'm
the only family
he's got.

1282
00:46:22,883 --> 00:46:25,485
I used to say
the same thing
about Ellie.

1283
00:46:28,722 --> 00:46:31,358
Hey, Dad!
Check it out!
I can dive!

1284
00:46:34,327 --> 00:46:37,131
Look at that.
He's very athletic.
He's quite good.

1285
00:46:37,165 --> 00:46:38,532
SEBASTIAN: Dad!

1286
00:46:38,565 --> 00:46:39,866
Yeah, he gets it
from my side.

1287
00:46:39,900 --> 00:46:41,268
Whoa!

1288
00:46:42,269 --> 00:46:43,905
Whoo-hoo!

1289
00:46:43,938 --> 00:46:45,238
Look at this!

1290
00:46:47,008 --> 00:46:48,508
Oh, my gosh!
Oh, shit!

1291
00:46:48,542 --> 00:46:49,576
(LAUGHING)

1292
00:46:49,609 --> 00:46:51,211
Sebastian,
your suit!
It's Versace.

1293
00:46:51,244 --> 00:46:52,345
Do you like it?

1294
00:46:52,379 --> 00:46:54,448
No, you moron!
It's not up!

1295
00:46:54,481 --> 00:46:56,918
Look down!
SEBASTIAN: Oh, God!

1296
00:46:56,951 --> 00:46:59,153
Hey, Bubba Gump! Nice shrimp!

1297
00:46:59,187 --> 00:47:01,254
SEBASTIAN:
I can't get it. Whoa!

1298
00:47:01,621 --> 00:47:02,823
Oh!

1299
00:47:02,856 --> 00:47:03,890
LUCKY: Whoa! You good, man?

1300
00:47:03,925 --> 00:47:05,459
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1301
00:47:05,492 --> 00:47:06,961
(IN ENGLISH)
What's the matter
with you?

1302
00:47:06,994 --> 00:47:08,328
Pull up your pants!

1303
00:47:08,361 --> 00:47:10,064
SEBASTIAN: I can't reach it.

1304
00:47:10,098 --> 00:47:12,866
Hey, what the hell
do I do? (GRUNTS)

1305
00:47:12,899 --> 00:47:14,835
Son, your sail
is at half-mast.

1306
00:47:14,868 --> 00:47:17,671
Oh, no, no, uh,
it looks like
it's full mast.

1307
00:47:17,704 --> 00:47:18,805
SEBASTIAN: Oh, no!

1308
00:47:19,873 --> 00:47:20,908
(YELLING)

1309
00:47:20,942 --> 00:47:22,076
(THUDS)

1310
00:47:22,110 --> 00:47:23,343
(GLASS SQUEAKING)
SALVO: Sebastian!

1311
00:47:23,376 --> 00:47:25,046
BILL: No, no.
Okay, don't...
TIGGER: No!

1312
00:47:25,079 --> 00:47:26,180
Stay down!
No, no. No.

1313
00:47:26,214 --> 00:47:27,982
Stay down.
Stay down.
No!

1314
00:47:28,015 --> 00:47:29,150
Okay. Okay.
God!

1315
00:47:29,183 --> 00:47:30,717
All right,
that is not
appropriate.

1316
00:47:30,751 --> 00:47:33,253
TIGGER: I'm going to be sick.
BILL: No, it's...

1317
00:47:33,286 --> 00:47:35,589
Honey, my mom
can't unsee that.

1318
00:47:37,357 --> 00:47:39,659
LUCKY: Hey, Sea Bass!
Say hi to TikTok.

1319
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:47,168
Dad, what
the hell you doing?

1320
00:47:47,201 --> 00:47:48,468
Packing.

1321
00:47:48,502 --> 00:47:50,504
I'm going back
to Chicago
tomorrow morning.

1322
00:47:50,537 --> 00:47:52,272
What, are you crazy?
We're not leaving.

1323
00:47:52,305 --> 00:47:53,941
You didn't even
give me the ring yet.

1324
00:47:53,975 --> 00:47:56,043
Trust me.
What I saw today,

1325
00:47:56,077 --> 00:47:57,878
you don't come back from.

1326
00:47:57,912 --> 00:47:59,379
Oh, stop being
so dramatic.

1327
00:47:59,412 --> 00:48:00,948
It was from far away.

1328
00:48:00,982 --> 00:48:02,116
Nobody saw much.

1329
00:48:02,150 --> 00:48:03,450
Yeah, that's for sure.

1330
00:48:03,483 --> 00:48:05,318
Look, I know
I haven't seen
you naked

1331
00:48:05,352 --> 00:48:06,988
since the delivery room,
but is it possible

1332
00:48:07,021 --> 00:48:09,422
your <i>pisellino</i> hasn't
even grown since then?

1333
00:48:09,456 --> 00:48:11,192
Would you put
the suitcase away?

1334
00:48:11,225 --> 00:48:12,659
No, I'm gonna
bring you home,

1335
00:48:12,692 --> 00:48:14,262
set you up
with some
Italian girls,

1336
00:48:14,294 --> 00:48:15,562
help you
start over fresh.

1337
00:48:15,595 --> 00:48:17,631
And I even got
a nice new
hairstyle for you.

1338
00:48:17,664 --> 00:48:19,599
Dad, I'm in love with Ellie.
That wouldn't change

1339
00:48:19,633 --> 00:48:21,936
if I accidentally showed
my balls to the entire world.

1340
00:48:21,969 --> 00:48:23,971
Oh, is that what
you got planned
for tomorrow?

1341
00:48:24,005 --> 00:48:25,605
Son, you gotta
stop pretending

1342
00:48:25,639 --> 00:48:28,042
that you fit in
with these people,
because you don't.

1343
00:48:28,075 --> 00:48:29,509
I'm not pretending.

1344
00:48:29,543 --> 00:48:31,344
Are you serious?
I mean, every time
you're with this family,

1345
00:48:31,378 --> 00:48:32,479
you make a fool of yourself.

1346
00:48:32,512 --> 00:48:34,081
Because you raised me

1347
00:48:34,115 --> 00:48:36,217
to be afraid
of trying anything new.

1348
00:48:36,250 --> 00:48:37,952
I mean, God.
Dad, listen,

1349
00:48:37,985 --> 00:48:40,754
I honestly...
I was nervous
to bring you here.

1350
00:48:40,787 --> 00:48:42,389
'Cause I knew
you would just
sit here,

1351
00:48:42,422 --> 00:48:44,292
and judge
with your black shirt,

1352
00:48:44,324 --> 00:48:45,392
your zipper purse,

1353
00:48:45,425 --> 00:48:46,726
your resting bitch face.

1354
00:48:46,760 --> 00:48:48,595
Hey, I don't have
resting bitch face.

1355
00:48:48,628 --> 00:48:50,597
We look like
Italian gargoyles.

1356
00:48:50,630 --> 00:48:52,033
You look
like you're
gonna murder

1357
00:48:52,066 --> 00:48:54,135
the entire
neighborhood.

1358
00:48:54,168 --> 00:48:55,702
You know what
your problem is?

1359
00:48:55,735 --> 00:48:58,405
You're so negative,
you can't let yourself
enjoy anything,

1360
00:48:58,438 --> 00:49:00,041
so you think I can't either.

1361
00:49:01,075 --> 00:49:04,078
Dad, Ellie is my future.

1362
00:49:04,111 --> 00:49:07,647
And I'm gonna keep
an open mind
about everything.

1363
00:49:07,681 --> 00:49:10,084
Whoa, whoa. What do
you mean, everything?

1364
00:49:10,117 --> 00:49:12,253
Even the job offer?
Maybe.

1365
00:49:12,286 --> 00:49:13,520
It's a pretty good one.

1366
00:49:15,856 --> 00:49:16,924
Unbelievable.

1367
00:49:17,457 --> 00:49:18,692
Unbelievable.

1368
00:49:19,093 --> 00:49:20,328
(DRAWER CLOSES)

1369
00:49:20,360 --> 00:49:21,661
Unbelievable.

1370
00:49:22,930 --> 00:49:24,397
(SIGHS)

1371
00:49:25,665 --> 00:49:27,868
First, your mother is
taken away from me.

1372
00:49:27,901 --> 00:49:29,502
Now you wanna leave.

1373
00:49:29,536 --> 00:49:31,872
I'm not leaving you, Dad.

1374
00:49:31,906 --> 00:49:34,674
Ellie's the best thing
that ever happened to me.

1375
00:49:34,708 --> 00:49:36,676
And when
I get married, not if,

1376
00:49:36,710 --> 00:49:40,547
her family is going to be
a big part of the package.

1377
00:49:40,580 --> 00:49:43,217
Now, I want you
to be a part of my life.

1378
00:49:43,251 --> 00:49:45,685
But if that's gonna happen,
you gotta give me some effort.

1379
00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:49,323
I wanna see
the Salvo at the salon

1380
00:49:49,357 --> 00:49:51,458
that everybody loves.

1381
00:49:51,491 --> 00:49:52,994
And if I don't,
I got no choice

1382
00:49:53,027 --> 00:49:54,561
but to leave you behind.

1383
00:49:59,399 --> 00:50:02,502
I don't know.
How can you say that?
How can you say that?

1384
00:50:02,535 --> 00:50:05,973
How could you say that
to your father?

1385
00:50:07,574 --> 00:50:10,044
You got no respect
for your family.

1386
00:50:10,077 --> 00:50:12,980
I got enough respect to know
we could go to bed angry

1387
00:50:14,348 --> 00:50:16,984
but not stinky.
Come on.

1388
00:50:18,718 --> 00:50:20,787
Now, come on,
let's do our
night spritz.

1389
00:50:27,794 --> 00:50:30,932
I miss you, and I wish
you were here for
so many reasons.

1390
00:50:30,965 --> 00:50:32,832
So many reasons, just...

1391
00:50:32,866 --> 00:50:35,602
For one, just tell me,
am I being an asshole?

1392
00:50:35,635 --> 00:50:38,872
Are we really doing
the right thing
for our son?

1393
00:50:38,906 --> 00:50:41,909
Just give me
some kind of sign,
something.

1394
00:50:42,243 --> 00:50:43,510
Please?

1395
00:50:43,543 --> 00:50:45,179
Just let me know
what you think.

1396
00:50:46,047 --> 00:50:47,647
I... I...

1397
00:50:47,681 --> 00:50:49,449
Give me some sign, honey.

1398
00:50:49,482 --> 00:50:52,552
(LEAVES RUSTLING)
(PEACOCK SQUAWKING)

1399
00:50:52,585 --> 00:50:58,159
(FLUTE PLAYING)

1400
00:51:08,336 --> 00:51:09,836
I love you.

1401
00:51:09,869 --> 00:51:11,604
(FLUTE PLAYING
FOLK TUNE)
Hi, Doug.

1402
00:51:12,639 --> 00:51:14,507
Hello.
What are you doing?

1403
00:51:14,541 --> 00:51:17,011
I was just serenading
the peacocks. (CHUCKLES)

1404
00:51:17,811 --> 00:51:18,878
Oh.

1405
00:51:21,614 --> 00:51:23,516
Would you be
open enough

1406
00:51:23,550 --> 00:51:26,387
to doing
a healing session
with me?

1407
00:51:26,420 --> 00:51:27,455
A healing session?

1408
00:51:27,487 --> 00:51:29,589
It'll be
very beneficial for you.

1409
00:51:31,359 --> 00:51:32,460
Well, that's a nice offer,

1410
00:51:32,492 --> 00:51:33,760
but I don't know
if I even know

1411
00:51:33,793 --> 00:51:34,962
what you're talking about.

1412
00:51:34,996 --> 00:51:38,598
Well, just start
by shutting your eyes,

1413
00:51:39,266 --> 00:51:41,035
and then,
really,
just focus

1414
00:51:41,068 --> 00:51:42,535
on your breathing.

1415
00:51:42,569 --> 00:51:43,870
In your nose.

1416
00:51:44,472 --> 00:51:45,772
Out your nose.

1417
00:51:46,474 --> 00:51:48,875
And if you can,

1418
00:51:48,909 --> 00:51:52,712
really try to connect
to that little Salvo,

1419
00:51:52,746 --> 00:51:55,182
that was afraid
when you were young.

1420
00:51:56,384 --> 00:51:58,386
I don't even know
where he is anymore.

1421
00:51:58,419 --> 00:52:00,087
That's so long ago.

1422
00:52:00,121 --> 00:52:02,756
You know, I'm in another...
I'm in another life.

1423
00:52:04,591 --> 00:52:07,395
Let me help you
find him, okay?

1424
00:52:07,428 --> 00:52:09,030
Just stay with your breath.

1425
00:52:10,965 --> 00:52:14,534
(PLAYING FOLK TUNE)

1426
00:52:16,603 --> 00:52:19,073
Heal, little Salvo.
Okay, I feel better.

1427
00:52:19,106 --> 00:52:20,508
(STOPS PLAYING)

1428
00:52:20,540 --> 00:52:21,775
You do?
Mmm-hmm.

1429
00:52:21,808 --> 00:52:23,277
Yeah. Thanks.
Okay.

1430
00:52:23,310 --> 00:52:25,112
I'm gonna
go to sleep.
Okay.

1431
00:52:25,146 --> 00:52:25,980
Thank you.
Good night.

1432
00:52:26,013 --> 00:52:27,714
Good night.
Good night, Doug.

1433
00:52:27,747 --> 00:52:29,316
I'm glad
I could help.
Thank you. Yeah.

1434
00:52:29,350 --> 00:52:31,551
Thank you.
Big help.

1435
00:52:31,584 --> 00:52:33,220
(PEACOCK SQUAWKING
IN DISTANCE)

1436
00:52:33,254 --> 00:52:35,855
SEBASTIAN: <i>Yesterday was</i>
<i>a day of regrettable firsts.</i>

1437
00:52:36,524 --> 00:52:37,857
<i>I yelled at my father</i>

1438
00:52:37,891 --> 00:52:41,195
<i>and I showed my balls</i>
<i>to my future in-laws.</i>

1439
00:52:41,228 --> 00:52:42,263
<i>But who knows?</i>

1440
00:52:42,296 --> 00:52:44,231
<i>Maybe everybody forgot?</i>

1441
00:52:44,265 --> 00:52:46,866
Well, there's
the big swimmer.

1442
00:52:46,900 --> 00:52:48,502
Hey, did you
see the full moon
last night?

1443
00:52:48,536 --> 00:52:50,337
Okay. Just...
I'm talking about
your butt.

1444
00:52:50,371 --> 00:52:51,939
BILL: All right.
Ignore him.

1445
00:52:51,972 --> 00:52:53,740
His butt cheeks
are the full moon.
Yes, I understand.

1446
00:52:53,773 --> 00:52:56,377
Um, how you
doing, kiddo?

1447
00:52:56,410 --> 00:52:58,345
I'm all right.
BILL: Good.

1448
00:52:58,379 --> 00:52:59,914
Have you seen my dad?
BILL: Yes.

1449
00:52:59,947 --> 00:53:01,581
He is out
taking a walk

1450
00:53:01,614 --> 00:53:02,882
with Ellie, Doug
and Tigger.

1451
00:53:02,917 --> 00:53:04,418
A walk?
BILL: Yes, he was...

1452
00:53:04,452 --> 00:53:05,685
he was...
Well, here.
(DOOR OPENS)

1453
00:53:05,718 --> 00:53:06,886
Speak of the devil.
SALVO: So I says to him...

1454
00:53:06,921 --> 00:53:08,923
I says, "Why would I
buy you a skateboard

1455
00:53:08,956 --> 00:53:10,191
"when I can build you one?"

1456
00:53:10,224 --> 00:53:13,127
Holy Mother of God.

1457
00:53:13,160 --> 00:53:14,528
Sleepy head,
I was just
telling 'em

1458
00:53:14,562 --> 00:53:15,695
about the time
I gave you
a skateboard

1459
00:53:15,728 --> 00:53:16,763
for Christmas.
You remember that?

1460
00:53:16,796 --> 00:53:18,132
Ah, I remember
that. Yeah.

1461
00:53:18,165 --> 00:53:19,732
What time
did you get up
anyway?

1462
00:53:19,766 --> 00:53:21,368
I got up early.
I didn't want
to wake you,

1463
00:53:21,402 --> 00:53:22,436
so I snuck out,

1464
00:53:22,470 --> 00:53:24,472
did my laundry,
watched TV,

1465
00:53:24,505 --> 00:53:26,240
fixed one
of their bannisters,

1466
00:53:26,273 --> 00:53:27,575
reorganized
the spice rack.

1467
00:53:27,607 --> 00:53:28,641
Then when
the sun came up,

1468
00:53:28,675 --> 00:53:30,211
I started making
breakfast.

1469
00:53:30,244 --> 00:53:32,313
Then I went
for a walk to get
to know the family.

1470
00:53:32,346 --> 00:53:33,581
Good people,
these Collins.

1471
00:53:33,613 --> 00:53:36,117
Good people.
Even the commie.

1472
00:53:36,150 --> 00:53:37,118
Oh, I'm
a socialist.

1473
00:53:37,151 --> 00:53:38,718
Well, whatever
you say,
Che Guevara.

1474
00:53:38,751 --> 00:53:41,021
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, that's funny.
(TIGGER CHUCKLING)

1475
00:53:42,590 --> 00:53:44,858
(SOFTLY) Get over here.

1476
00:53:44,891 --> 00:53:46,759
What the hell's going on?
What do you mean,
what's going on?

1477
00:53:46,793 --> 00:53:48,095
I'm doing what
you asked me to do.

1478
00:53:48,129 --> 00:53:49,863
Making an effort,
like you asked.

1479
00:53:49,896 --> 00:53:52,399
Okay. No, I appreciate it.
But Jesus, the shorts.

1480
00:53:52,433 --> 00:53:53,501
Yeah. So what?

1481
00:53:53,534 --> 00:53:54,734
I've never seen
your legs before.

1482
00:53:54,767 --> 00:53:56,003
(HESITATES)
Yeah, you haven't.

1483
00:53:56,036 --> 00:53:57,238
That's right.
They're not
too bad.

1484
00:53:57,271 --> 00:53:58,872
They look like
pretzel sticks
in socks.

1485
00:53:58,906 --> 00:54:00,107
Don't blame me.
This is what

1486
00:54:00,141 --> 00:54:01,509
these people
gave me,
you know?

1487
00:54:01,542 --> 00:54:04,578
What can I tell you?
I want to join the fun.

1488
00:54:04,612 --> 00:54:06,514
And I feel great,
and I can't wait

1489
00:54:06,547 --> 00:54:07,847
to see what the
universe suggests

1490
00:54:07,881 --> 00:54:09,749
after I opened
my eyes.

1491
00:54:09,782 --> 00:54:11,851
We did
a healing session
together.

1492
00:54:11,885 --> 00:54:14,522
Yeah. Little Salvo's
not afraid anymore.

1493
00:54:14,555 --> 00:54:16,557
Little Salvo?
Yeah.

1494
00:54:16,590 --> 00:54:18,192
TIGGER: I hope
everyone's ready

1495
00:54:18,225 --> 00:54:19,759
for Family Fun Day.

1496
00:54:19,792 --> 00:54:20,961
BILL: I am. I am.

1497
00:54:20,995 --> 00:54:22,363
SEBASTIAN: Oh,
what's Family Fun Day?

1498
00:54:22,396 --> 00:54:23,597
What? (CHUCKLES)
What, are you dense?

1499
00:54:23,631 --> 00:54:25,366
Everything you
need to know
is in the name.

1500
00:54:25,399 --> 00:54:26,666
Duh!
Duh!

1501
00:54:26,699 --> 00:54:28,035
Okay.
BOTH: <i>Salud!</i>

1502
00:54:28,068 --> 00:54:29,236
(WHISPERS)
What the hell
is this?

1503
00:54:29,270 --> 00:54:30,571
ELLIE: It's a big
4th of July tradition.

1504
00:54:30,604 --> 00:54:33,140
There's relay races,
and croquet,

1505
00:54:33,174 --> 00:54:34,341
and face painting,

1506
00:54:34,375 --> 00:54:35,643
and a hot dog
eating contest.

1507
00:54:35,675 --> 00:54:37,144
It's just a lot of fun.

1508
00:54:38,678 --> 00:54:41,115
(CROWD CHEERING)

1509
00:54:43,050 --> 00:54:44,451
SEBASTIAN: <i>I know</i>
<i>I'd asked the man</i>

1510
00:54:44,485 --> 00:54:45,685
<i>to start making an effort,</i>

1511
00:54:45,718 --> 00:54:47,121
<i>but this was crazy.</i>

1512
00:54:47,154 --> 00:54:49,689
<i>I felt like</i>
<i>I created a monster.</i>

1513
00:54:49,722 --> 00:54:51,791
<i>Except instead</i>
<i>of looking scary,</i>

1514
00:54:51,824 --> 00:54:55,095
<i>he was smiling, playing games,</i>

1515
00:54:55,129 --> 00:54:57,565
<i>dressing like</i>
<i>the American flag.</i>

1516
00:54:57,598 --> 00:54:58,731
All right!

1517
00:54:58,765 --> 00:55:00,935
The Maniscalcos.

1518
00:55:00,968 --> 00:55:03,237
What's your
angle here?
No angle. I'm happy.

1519
00:55:03,270 --> 00:55:04,505
I'm with my family.

1520
00:55:04,538 --> 00:55:05,573
Say, "Fireworks."

1521
00:55:05,606 --> 00:55:07,707
Fireworks.
Chee... Say firework.

1522
00:55:09,310 --> 00:55:11,579
(ALL CHEERING, CLAPPING)

1523
00:55:11,612 --> 00:55:13,113
It's like bocce with sticks.

1524
00:55:13,147 --> 00:55:14,148
(ALL LAUGHING)

1525
00:55:15,782 --> 00:55:17,418
All right.
You wanna
take a look?

1526
00:55:18,718 --> 00:55:20,421
Nice.
Right?

1527
00:55:20,454 --> 00:55:22,289
And the winner
of this year's

1528
00:55:22,323 --> 00:55:26,060
4th of July
hot dog eating
contest is

1529
00:55:26,093 --> 00:55:28,262
Salvo Manisculo!

1530
00:55:28,295 --> 00:55:30,331
(ALL CHEERING)

1531
00:55:35,868 --> 00:55:37,338
SEBASTIAN: <i>My father was</i>
<i>having a great time,</i>

1532
00:55:37,371 --> 00:55:40,507
<i>and suddenly, I was the one</i>
<i>who was uncomfortable.</i>

1533
00:55:40,541 --> 00:55:42,543
<i>I wanted him</i>
<i>to make an effort,</i>

1534
00:55:42,576 --> 00:55:44,877
<i>not change</i>
<i>who he was completely.</i>

1535
00:55:48,582 --> 00:55:49,950
SEBASTIAN: There he is.
(DOOR CLOSES)

1536
00:55:49,984 --> 00:55:51,385
The MVP.

1537
00:55:51,418 --> 00:55:53,153
What are you doing?
Checking out
your hardware?

1538
00:55:53,187 --> 00:55:55,489
I just figured out
how these people
stay so rich.

1539
00:55:55,522 --> 00:55:56,991
They do everything
on the cheap.

1540
00:55:57,024 --> 00:55:58,891
(TAPPING)
Hear that? Plastic.

1541
00:56:00,294 --> 00:56:01,195
Huh.

1542
00:56:01,228 --> 00:56:03,063
Just enjoy it,
will you, please?

1543
00:56:03,097 --> 00:56:05,032
I mean, you kicked
some ass out there today,

1544
00:56:05,065 --> 00:56:06,866
and I think these people
are starting to like you.

1545
00:56:06,899 --> 00:56:08,801
Yeah. Yeah. Come on.
They're just being polite.

1546
00:56:08,835 --> 00:56:09,970
I'm serious.

1547
00:56:10,004 --> 00:56:13,007
Bill even has
a signature scent now.

1548
00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:15,476
Oh, yeah?
What brand?
He won't divulge.

1549
00:56:15,509 --> 00:56:16,910
He won't divulge?
Yeah. (CHUCKLES)

1550
00:56:16,944 --> 00:56:18,946
Salvo.
SALVO: I wanna smell that.

1551
00:56:18,979 --> 00:56:20,681
Oh, my God.
I've been looking
all over for you.

1552
00:56:20,714 --> 00:56:22,683
Um, so,
my mom just
got invited

1553
00:56:22,716 --> 00:56:24,685
to be on MSNBC
in two hours.

1554
00:56:24,718 --> 00:56:25,785
That's great.
Yes.

1555
00:56:25,818 --> 00:56:27,655
Well, it would
be, but Tyler,

1556
00:56:27,688 --> 00:56:29,156
well, he's
in Sedona,

1557
00:56:29,189 --> 00:56:31,791
and I have
no one to do
my hair.

1558
00:56:31,824 --> 00:56:32,993
So we were
thinking

1559
00:56:33,027 --> 00:56:34,561
maybe you could
help her out.

1560
00:56:34,595 --> 00:56:35,929
I mean, that's like
asking Van Gogh

1561
00:56:35,963 --> 00:56:37,364
to draw a smiley face.

1562
00:56:37,398 --> 00:56:39,667
ELLIE: Yes!
TIGGER: Great!

1563
00:56:39,700 --> 00:56:41,068
(RELAXING MUSIC PLAYING)
TIGGER: Mmm.

1564
00:56:43,137 --> 00:56:44,538
I'd be lying to you
if I told you

1565
00:56:44,571 --> 00:56:47,675
I didn't have my eyes
on your lustrous mane
all weekend.

1566
00:56:47,708 --> 00:56:50,444
It's nice to finally get
my hands up in here.

1567
00:56:50,477 --> 00:56:52,845
Hmm. I am
very grateful.

1568
00:56:53,280 --> 00:56:54,381
Ah.

1569
00:56:55,815 --> 00:56:58,319
Are those cigars?

1570
00:56:58,818 --> 00:57:00,054
Yeah.

1571
00:57:01,622 --> 00:57:02,923
Can I have one?

1572
00:57:03,357 --> 00:57:04,391
Oh, boy.

1573
00:57:04,425 --> 00:57:06,493
This day just
keeps getting
better and better.

1574
00:57:06,527 --> 00:57:08,162
Of course,
you can have one.

1575
00:57:08,195 --> 00:57:09,263
Be my guest.

1576
00:57:12,199 --> 00:57:13,233
Oh!

1577
00:57:14,068 --> 00:57:15,769
Only the best.
Can I have one?

1578
00:57:15,803 --> 00:57:17,271
Oh, please
join me.

1579
00:57:17,738 --> 00:57:18,972
Okay.

1580
00:57:20,140 --> 00:57:21,141
(SNIFFS)

1581
00:57:22,109 --> 00:57:23,610
Fine.
(LIGHTER CLICKS)

1582
00:57:31,185 --> 00:57:32,252
Mmm.

1583
00:57:35,122 --> 00:57:36,190
You know,
I never met
a woman

1584
00:57:36,223 --> 00:57:39,393
who smokes
cigars before.
Yeah?

1585
00:57:39,426 --> 00:57:42,062
I got hooked
in the Navy.
Wait a minute.

1586
00:57:42,096 --> 00:57:44,398
You're military?
Mmm-hmm.

1587
00:57:44,431 --> 00:57:46,967
I thought you went to one
of those Ivy places.

1588
00:57:47,000 --> 00:57:49,002
I enlisted
after graduation.

1589
00:57:50,304 --> 00:57:52,973
I just felt
a duty to
my country.

1590
00:57:53,006 --> 00:57:55,376
But mostly, I did it
to piss off my parents.

1591
00:57:56,710 --> 00:57:57,911
You?

1592
00:57:58,412 --> 00:57:59,580
Army.

1593
00:57:59,613 --> 00:58:00,748
Combat?

1594
00:58:00,781 --> 00:58:02,383
Cook.
Ah!

1595
00:58:02,983 --> 00:58:04,518
Well, happy 4th to you.

1596
00:58:04,551 --> 00:58:05,586
You, too.

1597
00:58:05,619 --> 00:58:07,121
You, too.
<i>Salud.</i>

1598
00:58:07,154 --> 00:58:08,956
It's nice to have
another actual vet

1599
00:58:08,989 --> 00:58:11,091
out here to celebrate.

1600
00:58:14,128 --> 00:58:15,262
Oh!

1601
00:58:23,804 --> 00:58:25,072
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

1602
00:58:29,643 --> 00:58:31,078
ELLIE: (WHISPERS) Hey.

1603
00:58:31,111 --> 00:58:32,746
(WHISPERING)
How's it going?
I can't hear anything.

1604
00:58:32,780 --> 00:58:34,681
So they're either
getting along,

1605
00:58:34,715 --> 00:58:37,751
or they're
quietly stabbing
each other.

1606
00:58:37,785 --> 00:58:39,420
Listen, I have
great news.

1607
00:58:39,453 --> 00:58:41,422
What's up?
Okay. So,
that decorator

1608
00:58:41,455 --> 00:58:43,924
that bought all my work,
they've already
placed all the pieces.

1609
00:58:43,957 --> 00:58:45,492
They can't say where
for privacy reasons,

1610
00:58:45,526 --> 00:58:47,828
but it probably means
that they're gonna
want a lot more.

1611
00:58:47,861 --> 00:58:49,863
That's great!
Isn't it? (GASPS)

1612
00:58:49,897 --> 00:58:51,999
Wait. Why is
your voice going up?

1613
00:58:52,032 --> 00:58:53,267
Why does your face
look like that?

1614
00:58:53,300 --> 00:58:54,935
What's going on?

1615
00:58:54,968 --> 00:58:56,003
Listen, babe,

1616
00:58:56,036 --> 00:58:58,539
I...
(TIGGER SCREAMING)

1617
00:58:58,572 --> 00:58:59,840
SALVO: Voila.
(GASPS)

1618
00:58:59,873 --> 00:59:01,675
(SEBASTIAN EXCLAIMS
IN SURPRISE)

1619
00:59:01,708 --> 00:59:04,445
Oh, what...
What is this? What...

1620
00:59:05,412 --> 00:59:08,315
This isn't at all
what I asked
you to do.

1621
00:59:08,348 --> 00:59:11,785
Well, yeah.
You see, I don't
really do requests.

1622
00:59:11,819 --> 00:59:13,387
The way I work is,
I look at your face,

1623
00:59:13,420 --> 00:59:16,123
I get a sense
of your aura,
who you are,

1624
00:59:16,156 --> 00:59:17,991
then I let that
dictate the style

1625
00:59:18,025 --> 00:59:19,928
that your personality
demands.

1626
00:59:19,960 --> 00:59:22,095
I am about
to go on
television,

1627
00:59:22,129 --> 00:59:25,265
and I just...
I just wanted to
look like myself.

1628
00:59:25,299 --> 00:59:26,533
(GASPS) Oh!

1629
00:59:26,567 --> 00:59:29,169
(WHIMPERING) Bill,
do I look horrible?

1630
00:59:29,803 --> 00:59:31,638
No, no, no.
TIGGER: No?

1631
00:59:31,672 --> 00:59:33,040
It is not
horrible. It's...

1632
00:59:33,073 --> 00:59:36,043
Ellie?
Um, I just
feel like...

1633
00:59:36,076 --> 00:59:38,145
I don't know what it is.
Dad, couldn't
you just ditch

1634
00:59:38,178 --> 00:59:40,147
the aura crap,
and give her
what she wanted?

1635
00:59:40,180 --> 00:59:42,049
Whoa! That's like
asking Caravaggio
to go back in,

1636
00:59:42,082 --> 00:59:43,884
and retouch up
the beheading
of Holofernes.

1637
00:59:43,918 --> 00:59:45,052
The what a... Who?
I don't do that.

1638
00:59:45,085 --> 00:59:46,453
Can we, as a family,
please force Doug

1639
00:59:46,487 --> 00:59:48,422
to stop wearing
that organic de...

1640
00:59:48,455 --> 00:59:50,390
Holy shit, Mom!

1641
00:59:50,424 --> 00:59:51,625
Oh.

1642
00:59:51,658 --> 00:59:53,227
Why do you have
the exact same
haircut as Salvo?

1643
00:59:53,260 --> 00:59:55,295
That's it.
Oh, my God.

1644
00:59:55,329 --> 00:59:56,630
I don't think so.
LUCKY: You
guys look like

1645
00:59:56,663 --> 00:59:57,998
those weird
boy-girl twins

1646
00:59:58,031 --> 00:59:59,099
that, like,
just dress
the same.

1647
00:59:59,132 --> 01:00:00,701
Salvo, how could
you do this to me?

1648
01:00:00,734 --> 01:00:03,170
Wait, wait, wait.
First of all,
I didn't realize

1649
01:00:03,203 --> 01:00:04,471
I was doing
anything.

1650
01:00:04,505 --> 01:00:07,040
I mean, to me,
you look powerful,
gorgeous.

1651
01:00:07,074 --> 01:00:10,244
You look,
dare I even
say it, sexy.

1652
01:00:10,277 --> 01:00:11,545
Well, I am
supposed to go

1653
01:00:11,578 --> 01:00:12,746
on TV
in 10 minutes,

1654
01:00:12,779 --> 01:00:16,350
and you have made me look
like a bitter old Italian man!

1655
01:00:17,050 --> 01:00:18,987
Everybody,
please, get out.

1656
01:00:19,019 --> 01:00:21,054
Go, go, go,
go, go.
Sweetheart.

1657
01:00:21,088 --> 01:00:23,257
Mommy,
maybe you...
Get out!

1658
01:00:23,290 --> 01:00:25,192
<i>With all due</i>
<i>respect, Chris,</i>

1659
01:00:25,225 --> 01:00:28,629
<i>the existing policy</i>
<i>has been working</i>
<i>for two decades.</i>

1660
01:00:28,662 --> 01:00:30,664
<i>Why change now?</i>

1661
01:00:30,697 --> 01:00:32,099
Ah, she's kicking ass.

1662
01:00:32,132 --> 01:00:33,800
She's pretty much
talking about you.

1663
01:00:33,834 --> 01:00:35,235
Oh, stop being so dramatic.

1664
01:00:35,269 --> 01:00:37,738
<i>You don't</i>
<i>just make</i>
<i>major decisions</i>

1665
01:00:37,771 --> 01:00:39,873
based on instincts.

1666
01:00:39,908 --> 01:00:41,141
You've gotta listen

1667
01:00:41,174 --> 01:00:42,409
to the people
you're servicing,

1668
01:00:42,442 --> 01:00:45,245
or someone's
gonna end
up dead.

1669
01:00:45,279 --> 01:00:46,747
CHRIS: <i>All right.</i>
Yeah. Well, okay.

1670
01:00:46,780 --> 01:00:48,148
Maybe you got a point.
CHRIS: <i>Uh,</i>
<i>Senator MacArthur,</i>

1671
01:00:48,181 --> 01:00:49,984
I'm actually...
I'm very sorry...

1672
01:00:50,018 --> 01:00:52,185
Sorry to cut
you short.
"Cut me short"?

1673
01:00:52,219 --> 01:00:54,154
Did you say
"cut me short"?

1674
01:00:54,187 --> 01:00:57,457
Is that some kind
of sick joke,
Chris, huh?

1675
01:00:58,525 --> 01:00:59,994
Uh, as you can see,

1676
01:01:00,028 --> 01:01:01,728
uh, very
strong feelings,

1677
01:01:01,762 --> 01:01:03,564
uh, coming out of this story.

1678
01:01:03,597 --> 01:01:05,832
We're gonna continue to follow
its developments for you.

1679
01:01:05,866 --> 01:01:08,268
Listen, when this is all over,
you better apologize.

1680
01:01:08,302 --> 01:01:09,603
Apologize?
For what?

1681
01:01:09,636 --> 01:01:11,171
For what?
She wanted
a touch up.

1682
01:01:11,204 --> 01:01:12,372
You made her look
like David Bowie.

1683
01:01:12,406 --> 01:01:14,274
What? Are you
kidding me?
I gave her a 'do

1684
01:01:14,308 --> 01:01:15,876
that was very
age appropriate

1685
01:01:15,910 --> 01:01:18,345
and dignified.
She should
be thanking me.

1686
01:01:18,378 --> 01:01:19,948
I wouldn't hold
my breath, Salvo.

1687
01:01:19,981 --> 01:01:21,415
Oh, is she really pissed off?

1688
01:01:21,748 --> 01:01:22,984
When I left,

1689
01:01:23,017 --> 01:01:24,685
she was googling
homemade poisons.

1690
01:01:24,718 --> 01:01:26,620
I don't know
if it was for Salvo
or for herself.

1691
01:01:26,653 --> 01:01:27,888
Oh.
I don't get it.

1692
01:01:27,922 --> 01:01:30,457
Most women would be honored
to have their hair done

1693
01:01:30,490 --> 01:01:33,894
by East Chicago's three-time
Hair Stylist of the Year.

1694
01:01:33,928 --> 01:01:35,395
That was in the 80's.

1695
01:01:35,429 --> 01:01:37,297
The 80's. So what?
That's the golden age
of hair.

1696
01:01:37,331 --> 01:01:39,199
(ELLIE AND
SEBASTIAN GROAN)

1697
01:01:41,368 --> 01:01:43,071
Hi, Mom.

1698
01:01:43,103 --> 01:01:44,705
Would you go
talk to her?
Say something?

1699
01:01:44,738 --> 01:01:45,806
What am
I going to say?

1700
01:01:45,839 --> 01:01:47,441
Just say something,
all right?

1701
01:01:48,042 --> 01:01:49,543
Hey, uh, Tig.

1702
01:01:49,576 --> 01:01:51,211
Tig? Uh...

1703
01:01:51,244 --> 01:01:53,814
Tigger. Tigger,
I just want

1704
01:01:53,847 --> 01:01:55,282
to say
you looked
so good

1705
01:01:55,315 --> 01:01:56,583
up there
on the box.

1706
01:01:56,617 --> 01:01:58,953
Really, really.
Very, very dignified.

1707
01:01:58,987 --> 01:02:00,187
"On the box?"

1708
01:02:00,220 --> 01:02:03,757
Get on your feet,
and go over there.

1709
01:02:03,790 --> 01:02:05,158
All right?
All right.

1710
01:02:05,192 --> 01:02:06,793
(CLEARS THROAT)
Uh, Tig, uh...

1711
01:02:07,594 --> 01:02:09,329
I just wanna...

1712
01:02:10,163 --> 01:02:12,000
tell you I'm sorry

1713
01:02:12,033 --> 01:02:15,003
for giving you
a very high-quality hairdo

1714
01:02:15,036 --> 01:02:16,570
without your permission.

1715
01:02:17,437 --> 01:02:19,373
I heard the word "sorry."

1716
01:02:19,406 --> 01:02:21,341
But then you followed it up

1717
01:02:21,375 --> 01:02:23,777
with a compliment
to yourself.

1718
01:02:23,810 --> 01:02:25,947
Well, if I'm being
honest, I never
gave that style

1719
01:02:25,980 --> 01:02:28,016
to anybody else before.

1720
01:02:28,049 --> 01:02:29,383
So I really think

1721
01:02:29,416 --> 01:02:30,985
your aura commands
the respect

1722
01:02:31,019 --> 01:02:32,853
that I typically
only reserve for myself.

1723
01:02:32,886 --> 01:02:35,957
So I am sorry
that I, you know,

1724
01:02:35,990 --> 01:02:38,358
didn't do exactly
what you asked for.

1725
01:02:38,892 --> 01:02:40,160
Thanks.

1726
01:02:49,469 --> 01:02:50,871
You know?
Hey, you know what?

1727
01:02:50,905 --> 01:02:52,940
Let... Let me make

1728
01:02:52,974 --> 01:02:54,541
an offer. I would
love to make

1729
01:02:54,574 --> 01:02:58,046
a full Italian dinner
for everybody.

1730
01:02:58,079 --> 01:02:59,279
That sounds so nice.
How about that?

1731
01:02:59,312 --> 01:03:00,814
And also
as a thank you,

1732
01:03:00,847 --> 01:03:02,349
and with great
appreciation,

1733
01:03:02,382 --> 01:03:05,019
for letting us stay
in this beautiful home.

1734
01:03:05,053 --> 01:03:06,453
That won't be necessary.

1735
01:03:06,486 --> 01:03:08,355
We don't keep
a lot of food here

1736
01:03:08,388 --> 01:03:10,958
and the markets are
closed for the holiday.

1737
01:03:10,992 --> 01:03:12,259
Don't worry.

1738
01:03:12,292 --> 01:03:14,128
A Maniscalco
always finds a way

1739
01:03:14,162 --> 01:03:15,696
to feed
his family,
right?

1740
01:03:15,729 --> 01:03:17,131
Yep. You got it.

1741
01:03:17,165 --> 01:03:18,598
I think it's
a wonderful idea.

1742
01:03:18,632 --> 01:03:20,500
I mean, if you look
like an Italian man,

1743
01:03:20,534 --> 01:03:22,369
why not eat like one,
huh? (CHUCKLING)

1744
01:03:22,402 --> 01:03:24,237
No, I mean,
if you...
I meant Italian...

1745
01:03:24,271 --> 01:03:25,739
TIGGER:
Shut up, Bill.

1746
01:03:25,772 --> 01:03:28,442
I'll be sleeping
on the couch tonight.

1747
01:03:28,475 --> 01:03:32,212
<i>(GUARDA COME DONDOLO</i>
BY EDOARDO VIANELLO PLAYING)

1748
01:03:35,348 --> 01:03:36,450
SEBASTIAN:
<i>Everybody likes to talk</i>

1749
01:03:36,483 --> 01:03:39,286
<i>about how bad</i>
<i>social media is.</i>

1750
01:03:44,257 --> 01:03:45,425
<i>But in this case,</i>

1751
01:03:45,459 --> 01:03:48,129
<i>it really worked out</i>
<i>for my dad.</i>

1752
01:03:48,162 --> 01:03:50,597
Senator Tigger MacArthur
is going viral today,

1753
01:03:50,630 --> 01:03:53,333
and for the first time,
for all the right reasons.

1754
01:03:53,366 --> 01:03:55,469
<i>This new haircut</i>
<i>is giving me like...</i>

1755
01:03:55,502 --> 01:03:57,304
G.I. Jane two months
out of boot camp.

1756
01:03:57,337 --> 01:03:58,772
<i>It's giving me</i>
<i>gender fluidity.</i>

1757
01:03:58,805 --> 01:04:00,908
It's giving me fresh,
hot, gorgeous.

1758
01:04:00,942 --> 01:04:02,342
Whoever did that haircut,

1759
01:04:03,376 --> 01:04:06,080
America thanks you. Ah!

1760
01:04:06,114 --> 01:04:08,882
SEBASTIAN: <i>Now that</i>
<i>Tigger's approval rating</i>
<i>was through the roof,</i>

1761
01:04:08,916 --> 01:04:11,818
<i>she was happy to let</i>
<i>my dad back under hers.</i>

1762
01:04:11,852 --> 01:04:15,355
(MOUTH FULL)
So good.
So, this is delicious.

1763
01:04:15,388 --> 01:04:17,091
I can't believe

1764
01:04:17,125 --> 01:04:18,325
that you put
this all together

1765
01:04:18,358 --> 01:04:19,860
from what we have
in the kitchen.

1766
01:04:19,893 --> 01:04:22,262
My guess is he raided
the kitchen over at The Shack.

1767
01:04:22,295 --> 01:04:23,965
So, you might wanna call

1768
01:04:23,998 --> 01:04:26,500
Gloria over there,
see if you got
some inventory.

1769
01:04:27,034 --> 01:04:28,368
Mmm, mmm.

1770
01:04:28,401 --> 01:04:30,004
(MOUTH FULL)
What do you call
this again, Salvo?

1771
01:04:30,037 --> 01:04:31,371
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1772
01:04:31,404 --> 01:04:35,542
(BOTH SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1773
01:04:35,575 --> 01:04:36,777
(IN ENGLISH)
It is delicious.

1774
01:04:36,810 --> 01:04:38,678
I'm going for seconds.
Don't tell my trainer.

1775
01:04:38,712 --> 01:04:41,515
It's really good.
I just wish you hadn't used
my bowls. (CHUCKLES)

1776
01:04:41,548 --> 01:04:43,617
Well, you know,
I used your bowls, Doug,

1777
01:04:43,650 --> 01:04:46,286
because I wanted
to add a special

1778
01:04:46,319 --> 01:04:49,689
spiritual reverberation
to the meal.

1779
01:04:49,723 --> 01:04:52,160
So, that's why,
you know?
Okay.

1780
01:04:52,193 --> 01:04:54,028
Yeah.
So, thank you

1781
01:04:54,061 --> 01:04:55,428
for that
contribution.
Okay.

1782
01:04:55,462 --> 01:04:57,497
Salvo, it's delicious.
(MOUTH FULL)
Delicious.

1783
01:04:57,531 --> 01:04:59,299
Listen, given everything
you're doing for my son,

1784
01:04:59,332 --> 01:05:00,767
this is the least
I can do.
Oh.

1785
01:05:00,801 --> 01:05:03,870
And I just wanna
say something that

1786
01:05:04,471 --> 01:05:05,973
my father used to say.

1787
01:05:06,740 --> 01:05:09,709
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1788
01:05:09,743 --> 01:05:10,912
(IN ENGLISH)
The translation is,

1789
01:05:10,945 --> 01:05:13,147
"The family isn't
just one important thing,

1790
01:05:13,181 --> 01:05:14,748
"it's everything."

1791
01:05:14,781 --> 01:05:17,084
And I like
to toast to that.
BILL: Lovely.

1792
01:05:17,118 --> 01:05:19,020
<i>Salud!</i>
ALL: <i>Salud!</i>

1793
01:05:19,053 --> 01:05:21,088
ELLIE: To everything.
<i>Salud.</i>

1794
01:05:21,122 --> 01:05:22,556
Cheers, everybody.
BILL: Well said.

1795
01:05:22,589 --> 01:05:24,025
(WOMEN EXCLAIMING)
Watch it, watch it.

1796
01:05:24,058 --> 01:05:25,425
Oh, collision!

1797
01:05:25,458 --> 01:05:27,161
BILL: Cut him off.
Time for some
more vino, huh?

1798
01:05:27,195 --> 01:05:29,197
ELLIE: Oh, yes.
When in Rome.

1799
01:05:29,230 --> 01:05:30,264
Because,
you know,

1800
01:05:30,298 --> 01:05:31,665
you guys
are Italian.

1801
01:05:31,698 --> 01:05:33,767
(ALL LAUGHING)

1802
01:05:33,800 --> 01:05:36,436
You got a problem
with Italians, Bill?
Yeah, Bill.

1803
01:05:36,469 --> 01:05:38,572
(STUTTERING
NERVOUSLY)

1804
01:05:41,575 --> 01:05:44,344
(ALL LAUGHING)
Who got you?
Come on, Bill!

1805
01:05:44,377 --> 01:05:46,379
I thought he was
serious. (CHUCKLES)

1806
01:05:48,216 --> 01:05:49,482
(BOTTLE CLANKS ON COUNTER)

1807
01:05:57,291 --> 01:05:59,126
(SOFTLY)
What's this?

1808
01:05:59,160 --> 01:06:00,360
You know, just...
(UNZIPS ZIPPER)

1809
01:06:00,393 --> 01:06:02,063
...the sexiest way
I can think of

1810
01:06:02,096 --> 01:06:03,264
to say thank you.

1811
01:06:03,297 --> 01:06:04,431
Here? Are you
kidding me?
(SHUSHING)

1812
01:06:04,464 --> 01:06:05,799
They're in
the next room.
(SHUSHING)

1813
01:06:05,832 --> 01:06:08,069
You know
I'm a screamer.
I know.

1814
01:06:08,102 --> 01:06:09,436
Just come
over here.

1815
01:06:12,206 --> 01:06:14,708
Oh! Oh, yeah.

1816
01:06:16,177 --> 01:06:17,410
(SEBASTIAN MOANS)

1817
01:06:18,079 --> 01:06:19,080
(ELLIE MOANS)

1818
01:06:20,214 --> 01:06:21,848
(SEBASTIAN SPEAKING ITALIAN)
Hmm?

1819
01:06:22,582 --> 01:06:23,850
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1820
01:06:23,884 --> 01:06:25,518
ELLIE: What, baby? What?
Oh, we got
to go inside.

1821
01:06:25,552 --> 01:06:27,787
I'm getting eaten alive.
What? What are
you talking about?

1822
01:06:27,821 --> 01:06:28,923
I saw a raccoon.
Is that a safe word?

1823
01:06:28,956 --> 01:06:30,124
There's raccoons
everywhere.
Raccoon?

1824
01:06:30,157 --> 01:06:31,725
Yeah.
Where? What raccoon?

1825
01:06:31,758 --> 01:06:33,928
SEBASTIAN: There's
some wildlife.
Honey, there's no raccoons.

1826
01:06:33,961 --> 01:06:35,329
BILL: (DISTORTED) Mmm.

1827
01:06:35,363 --> 01:06:37,764
SEBASTIAN: <i>Seeing</i>
<i>my future in-laws eat</i>

1828
01:06:37,797 --> 01:06:41,568
<i>their family pet is</i>
<i>is as close to an acid trip</i>

1829
01:06:41,601 --> 01:06:43,371
<i>as I ever wanna be.</i>

1830
01:06:43,403 --> 01:06:45,039
(DISTORTED)
Here comes the airplane.

1831
01:06:45,072 --> 01:06:46,840
(LUCKY MIMICS ENGINE WHIRRING)

1832
01:06:46,873 --> 01:06:48,541
Ah, no!

1833
01:06:48,575 --> 01:06:51,212
(DISTORTED)
This Italian food's
going to my head.

1834
01:06:51,245 --> 01:06:53,080
(MIMICS CHICKEN CLUCKING)

1835
01:06:53,114 --> 01:06:59,719
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1836
01:06:59,753 --> 01:07:03,757
SEBASTIAN: <i>This was proof</i>
<i>the man was diabolical.</i>

1837
01:07:03,790 --> 01:07:05,960
I murdered Sergeant Feathers.

1838
01:07:06,260 --> 01:07:08,595
(SCREAMS)

1839
01:07:12,499 --> 01:07:14,668
I can't believe

1840
01:07:14,701 --> 01:07:15,769
you fed 'em
a peacock.

1841
01:07:15,802 --> 01:07:17,271
How could
you do this?
Easy.

1842
01:07:17,305 --> 01:07:19,706
My recipe called for chicken.
All the stores were closed.

1843
01:07:19,739 --> 01:07:21,841
So what does a great chef do?
He improvises.

1844
01:07:21,875 --> 01:07:23,677
By murdering
their beloved mascot?

1845
01:07:23,710 --> 01:07:25,845
They still got
three left. Are
you kidding me?

1846
01:07:25,879 --> 01:07:27,248
Where we come from,
it's called,

1847
01:07:27,281 --> 01:07:28,748
"You gotta do what you gotta
do to feed the family."

1848
01:07:28,782 --> 01:07:30,583
It's called
the peasant mentality.

1849
01:07:30,617 --> 01:07:31,751
Look around, Dad.

1850
01:07:31,785 --> 01:07:33,020
These people
aren't peasants.

1851
01:07:33,054 --> 01:07:34,188
And you thought
I was crazy

1852
01:07:34,221 --> 01:07:35,423
for worrying
that you were gonna

1853
01:07:35,455 --> 01:07:37,891
make us look like
some bad Italian stereotype?

1854
01:07:37,925 --> 01:07:40,027
Come on. You know
I'm not doing that.

1855
01:07:40,061 --> 01:07:41,594
Are you blind? Look at...

1856
01:07:41,628 --> 01:07:43,197
We are
in the woods

1857
01:07:43,230 --> 01:07:44,497
in the middle
of the night

1858
01:07:44,531 --> 01:07:47,101
trying to get rid
of a freakin' body.

1859
01:07:47,134 --> 01:07:48,202
That's right.

1860
01:07:48,235 --> 01:07:49,803
To help me get
rid of the evidence.

1861
01:07:49,836 --> 01:07:51,871
Why does it seem like
you've done this before?

1862
01:07:53,040 --> 01:07:54,442
(MUMBLING)

1863
01:07:54,474 --> 01:07:55,642
Stupid bird!
It's dead!

1864
01:07:55,675 --> 01:07:57,011
What are
you doing?

1865
01:07:57,044 --> 01:07:58,511
Look at
its feathers.

1866
01:08:05,152 --> 01:08:06,220
Night cologne?

1867
01:08:16,364 --> 01:08:18,299
(CLEARS THROAT)
Listen, son,

1868
01:08:18,332 --> 01:08:21,402
I was just trying
to help you win
this family over

1869
01:08:21,435 --> 01:08:23,770
by making
a good meal,
that's all.

1870
01:08:23,803 --> 01:08:25,239
Well, if this is
your idea of help,

1871
01:08:25,272 --> 01:08:26,639
I think I'm good, Dad.

1872
01:08:27,008 --> 01:08:28,775
Jesus.

1873
01:08:28,808 --> 01:08:29,876
Why do I feel
like you're trying

1874
01:08:29,910 --> 01:08:31,245
to wreck this
for me?
Wreck it?

1875
01:08:31,278 --> 01:08:33,613
I'm just making an effort
like you asked me to do.

1876
01:08:33,646 --> 01:08:34,814
Well, it turns out
the only thing worse

1877
01:08:34,848 --> 01:08:37,517
than you not trying
is you trying.

1878
01:08:37,550 --> 01:08:39,719
Well, maybe to you,
but to me, these people,

1879
01:08:39,753 --> 01:08:41,222
they seem
to like me.
Like you?

1880
01:08:41,255 --> 01:08:43,723
If I told these people
the truth about what happened,

1881
01:08:43,757 --> 01:08:45,126
they'd never
have us back here.

1882
01:08:47,061 --> 01:08:48,828
(SIGHS)

1883
01:08:48,862 --> 01:08:51,698
You know, why did
I let Ellie convince me
to bring you here?

1884
01:08:51,731 --> 01:08:53,034
What do you mean,
"bring me here"?

1885
01:08:53,067 --> 01:08:54,734
You're the one
who invited me,
didn't you?

1886
01:08:54,768 --> 01:08:56,971
Yeah, I invited you
to get grandma's ring.

1887
01:08:57,004 --> 01:08:59,507
I didn't know you were
gonna spend the whole time
sabotaging me.

1888
01:08:59,539 --> 01:09:01,208
What are you
talking about,
"sabotaging"?

1889
01:09:01,242 --> 01:09:02,542
How could you say that?

1890
01:09:02,575 --> 01:09:03,944
Everything I'm
doing for you,

1891
01:09:03,978 --> 01:09:06,380
that I've ever done
for you is for
your own good,

1892
01:09:06,414 --> 01:09:07,847
to give you
a better life.

1893
01:09:07,881 --> 01:09:09,716
You love to say that,
but now that
I'm gonna get it,

1894
01:09:09,749 --> 01:09:11,419
it's like you're
trying to stop it.

1895
01:09:11,452 --> 01:09:13,054
Trying to
stop what?

1896
01:09:13,087 --> 01:09:14,621
I'm trying to make sure
that you don't make
an ass out of yourself

1897
01:09:14,654 --> 01:09:16,223
by trying to be
somebody you're not.

1898
01:09:16,257 --> 01:09:17,358
You're your own person.

1899
01:09:17,391 --> 01:09:18,758
You're your own man.
Be your own man.

1900
01:09:18,792 --> 01:09:20,660
Otherwise,
it's embarrassing.

1901
01:09:20,693 --> 01:09:22,029
(SCOFFING) Oh, man.
You know what?

1902
01:09:22,063 --> 01:09:23,998
This is your problem.
You're so focused

1903
01:09:24,031 --> 01:09:26,300
on other people
being embarrassed,

1904
01:09:26,333 --> 01:09:29,503
you can't see who
the most embarrassing
person is.

1905
01:09:29,537 --> 01:09:30,837
It's you.

1906
01:09:32,073 --> 01:09:34,308
(SIGHS)
That's really
what you think?

1907
01:09:38,012 --> 01:09:40,014
Let's just go
to sleep,
all right?

1908
01:09:40,047 --> 01:09:41,714
(BEDSHEETS RUSTLING)

1909
01:10:15,782 --> 01:10:18,852
SEBASTIAN: <i>The next morning,</i>
<i>it was the 4th of July,</i>

1910
01:10:18,885 --> 01:10:20,354
<i>which made sense,</i>
<i>'cause I was</i>

1911
01:10:20,387 --> 01:10:22,923
<i>finally getting</i>
<i>my independence.</i>

1912
01:10:22,957 --> 01:10:25,526
<i>It was an amazing feeling.</i>

1913
01:10:25,559 --> 01:10:27,995
<i>But much like</i>
<i>my signature scent,</i>

1914
01:10:28,028 --> 01:10:29,863
<i>it was a little bittersweet.</i>

1915
01:10:31,664 --> 01:10:34,034
<i>But this was</i>
<i>the beginning of my new life.</i>

1916
01:10:34,767 --> 01:10:37,004
<i>And now that I had the ring,</i>

1917
01:10:37,037 --> 01:10:39,006
<i>it was time to make my move.</i>

1918
01:10:44,912 --> 01:10:46,580
SEBASTIAN:
I've given this
a lot of thought

1919
01:10:46,614 --> 01:10:48,315
over the last
few days,

1920
01:10:48,349 --> 01:10:50,518
and on top
of accepting

1921
01:10:50,551 --> 01:10:52,620
your very generous offer

1922
01:10:52,652 --> 01:10:55,156
to run the Barrymore Hotel,

1923
01:10:55,189 --> 01:10:58,392
I would also like
to ask your permission

1924
01:10:58,425 --> 01:11:00,727
to propose to Ellie.

1925
01:11:02,963 --> 01:11:04,298
Oh.

1926
01:11:04,331 --> 01:11:06,300
Ah, that doesn't...

1927
01:11:07,434 --> 01:11:08,969
I... (SIGHS)

1928
01:11:11,005 --> 01:11:13,240
We're kidding!
(TIGGER CHUCKLES)

1929
01:11:13,274 --> 01:11:14,874
(BILL LAUGHING)

1930
01:11:14,909 --> 01:11:16,743
We got him.
Ho! You
should've seen

1931
01:11:16,776 --> 01:11:19,613
the look
on your face.
Priceless.

1932
01:11:19,647 --> 01:11:21,415
Our answer is
an emphatic...

1933
01:11:21,448 --> 01:11:23,083
BOTH: Yes!
Oh, God.

1934
01:11:23,117 --> 01:11:25,852
Gee, Sebastian,
we just love you.

1935
01:11:25,885 --> 01:11:27,521
And we just...
We cannot

1936
01:11:27,555 --> 01:11:29,290
wait for you
and Ellie

1937
01:11:29,323 --> 01:11:30,823
to join the party
in D.C.

1938
01:11:30,857 --> 01:11:33,194
TIGGER: Yes.
And this is perfect.

1939
01:11:33,227 --> 01:11:36,163
We're doing our family
Christmas card photo today.

1940
01:11:36,197 --> 01:11:38,698
You can propose there,
and then be in it!

1941
01:11:38,731 --> 01:11:41,768
Oh, thank God.
I was so nervous

1942
01:11:41,801 --> 01:11:43,938
how you guys would react
to this, you know?

1943
01:11:43,971 --> 01:11:46,473
Especially, what's happened
this weekend with my father.

1944
01:11:46,507 --> 01:11:49,476
No. That dinner
was wonderful.

1945
01:11:49,510 --> 01:11:52,712
(BOTH SPEAKING ITALIAN)

1946
01:11:52,745 --> 01:11:54,648
(IN ENGLISH) Yeah.
Fantastic. Memorable.

1947
01:11:54,682 --> 01:11:56,450
TIGGER:
Chicken <i>al cavone.</i>

1948
01:11:56,483 --> 01:11:58,519
(BILL SPEAKING ITALIAN)
Fantastic.

1949
01:11:58,552 --> 01:11:59,620
Never had it.
BILL: Terrific.

1950
01:11:59,653 --> 01:12:00,955
TIGGER: Yes.
Don't know what's in it.

1951
01:12:00,988 --> 01:12:02,356
(SOFT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

1952
01:12:02,389 --> 01:12:04,124
What the hell kind
of elf are you
supposed to be?

1953
01:12:04,158 --> 01:12:07,428
I'm representing
all the holiday
traditions.

1954
01:12:07,461 --> 01:12:08,828
Nice.
(CHUCKLES)

1955
01:12:08,861 --> 01:12:10,397
You're as plump
as a little partridge.

1956
01:12:10,431 --> 01:12:12,967
Yes.
(BOTH LAUGHING)

1957
01:12:13,000 --> 01:12:14,501
Oh, oh.

1958
01:12:14,535 --> 01:12:15,768
Hey, you fit
right in.

1959
01:12:15,802 --> 01:12:17,271
Uh, I don't know.

1960
01:12:17,304 --> 01:12:18,539
Can I propose first

1961
01:12:18,572 --> 01:12:20,207
and then put on
the tree costume?

1962
01:12:20,241 --> 01:12:21,141
(BOTH LAUGHING)

1963
01:12:21,175 --> 01:12:22,509
What's
the difference?
Oh, E... Ellie.

1964
01:12:22,543 --> 01:12:24,712
Ellie, where's
your costume?
BILL: We... We can't

1965
01:12:24,744 --> 01:12:25,878
do this without
our reindeer.

1966
01:12:25,913 --> 01:12:27,314
I'm sorry, but I'm
not gonna be taking

1967
01:12:27,348 --> 01:12:29,216
the photo this year,
because I no longer

1968
01:12:29,250 --> 01:12:30,618
wanna be a part
of this family.

1969
01:12:30,651 --> 01:12:33,020
Also, Sebastian
isn't taking the job,

1970
01:12:33,053 --> 01:12:34,887
we are not
moving to D.C.

1971
01:12:34,922 --> 01:12:36,190
and we're not gonna
spend any more time

1972
01:12:36,223 --> 01:12:37,958
with these
manipulators.
So, let's go.

1973
01:12:37,992 --> 01:12:39,892
What happened?
What's happened?

1974
01:12:39,927 --> 01:12:42,630
Dad, what do all
of your hotels
have in common?

1975
01:12:42,663 --> 01:12:44,965
Five-star experience
at a three-star price.

1976
01:12:44,999 --> 01:12:48,302
(BILL CHUCKLING)
No. The answer is

1977
01:12:48,335 --> 01:12:49,802
their lobby art.

1978
01:12:49,836 --> 01:12:50,903
Oh.
Shall we start

1979
01:12:50,938 --> 01:12:52,239
with the Barrymore
Hotel?
Uh-oh.

1980
01:12:52,273 --> 01:12:54,008
Shall we? Come on.
No, I don't
need to see...

1981
01:12:54,041 --> 01:12:56,543
Oh, look.
Do you notice
anything familiar

1982
01:12:56,577 --> 01:12:57,877
about the walls?
Well, no.

1983
01:12:57,911 --> 01:12:59,713
That's
my painting,
isn't it?

1984
01:12:59,747 --> 01:13:01,515
Well,
what's that?
My painting.

1985
01:13:01,548 --> 01:13:02,716
My painting.

1986
01:13:02,750 --> 01:13:04,817
Oh, yeah,
my painting.
BILL: All right.

1987
01:13:04,851 --> 01:13:07,087
It was
your dad's idea!

1988
01:13:07,121 --> 01:13:08,389
Wait. Just wait.
It was
your dad's idea.

1989
01:13:08,422 --> 01:13:10,090
No. One second here.
(MOUTHING)
It was him.

1990
01:13:10,124 --> 01:13:11,725
I just wanna know
how you found out.

1991
01:13:11,759 --> 01:13:13,394
Sebastian,
did you tell her?

1992
01:13:15,229 --> 01:13:16,230
What?

1993
01:13:16,829 --> 01:13:18,399
You knew
about this?

1994
01:13:19,767 --> 01:13:22,970
Well, no,
I kind of saw...

1995
01:13:23,003 --> 01:13:25,506
I can't believe that
you all did this to me.

1996
01:13:25,539 --> 01:13:27,441
Ellie, we can explain.

1997
01:13:27,474 --> 01:13:28,742
We can explain.
No, Mom!

1998
01:13:28,776 --> 01:13:31,612
This whole time
I thought I was
selling my art

1999
01:13:31,645 --> 01:13:33,347
to this cool new designer,

2000
01:13:33,380 --> 01:13:35,716
when really
my parents
just hired them

2001
01:13:35,749 --> 01:13:36,784
to buy my work.

2002
01:13:36,816 --> 01:13:37,951
No, no, no, darling.

2003
01:13:37,985 --> 01:13:39,219
No, that's
not... No.

2004
01:13:39,253 --> 01:13:41,888
Yes. Yes, that is
technically true.

2005
01:13:41,922 --> 01:13:44,124
I thought
I was killing it
in the art world!

2006
01:13:44,158 --> 01:13:46,060
We just wanted you
to get a jump-start

2007
01:13:46,093 --> 01:13:47,928
in a really,
really rough business.

2008
01:13:47,961 --> 01:13:49,263
It's so terrible
out there.
You know how rough it is.

2009
01:13:49,296 --> 01:13:50,798
It's what you
always do.
You're always...

2010
01:13:50,830 --> 01:13:52,032
You're just
stealing
our lessons.

2011
01:13:52,066 --> 01:13:54,601
You bribe our way
onto sports teams,

2012
01:13:54,635 --> 01:13:56,437
you rewrite
our college essays,

2013
01:13:56,470 --> 01:13:58,138
you hire famous rappers

2014
01:13:58,172 --> 01:13:59,773
to emcee
our birthday parties.

2015
01:13:59,807 --> 01:14:01,175
That was also
not my idea.
Okay. So what?

2016
01:14:01,208 --> 01:14:02,676
Now you don't
like Warren G?

2017
01:14:02,710 --> 01:14:03,944
Look, you guys are
great parents.

2018
01:14:03,977 --> 01:14:06,046
Don't let her guilt you
into changing your ways.

2019
01:14:06,080 --> 01:14:07,981
All I have ever wanted
was to feel like

2020
01:14:08,015 --> 01:14:10,484
I was accomplishing
things on my own.

2021
01:14:12,186 --> 01:14:13,787
And I can't believe
that you just didn't

2022
01:14:13,821 --> 01:14:15,122
say something to me.

2023
01:14:16,957 --> 01:14:18,826
Sweetheart, we, um...

2024
01:14:18,858 --> 01:14:21,595
Oh, my gosh.
I told you.
Well, yeah.

2025
01:14:21,628 --> 01:14:23,997
(DOUG SNORING)

2026
01:14:26,266 --> 01:14:27,968
SEBASTIAN: <i>I'd been</i>
<i>so focused on trying</i>

2027
01:14:28,001 --> 01:14:30,003
<i>to please Ellie's family,</i>

2028
01:14:30,037 --> 01:14:32,806
<i>that I lost sight</i>
<i>of what I came here to do.</i>

2029
01:14:32,840 --> 01:14:35,909
<i>I had to find Ellie</i>
<i>and make this right.</i>

2030
01:14:35,943 --> 01:14:38,612
<i>And I knew exactly</i>
<i>where she'd be.</i>

2031
01:14:38,645 --> 01:14:40,147
Permission
to approach?

2032
01:14:54,561 --> 01:14:56,363
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

2033
01:14:59,199 --> 01:15:01,101
Place could use
a remodel, huh?

2034
01:15:06,573 --> 01:15:08,208
I'm sorry.

2035
01:15:08,242 --> 01:15:09,977
I should've said something.

2036
01:15:10,677 --> 01:15:12,179
Yeah, you should have.

2037
01:15:13,981 --> 01:15:16,583
Is there anything I could do
to make it up to you?

2038
01:15:16,617 --> 01:15:19,853
Just being in this family

2039
01:15:19,887 --> 01:15:22,289
is like bowling
with bumpers.

2040
01:15:22,322 --> 01:15:23,557
It's like,

2041
01:15:23,590 --> 01:15:25,759
no matter what I try to do,

2042
01:15:25,793 --> 01:15:27,428
they're always
setting up rails

2043
01:15:27,461 --> 01:15:28,695
to make sure that I win.

2044
01:15:28,729 --> 01:15:31,598
And sometimes,
I just want to free bowl,

2045
01:15:31,632 --> 01:15:32,833
because then,
that way

2046
01:15:32,866 --> 01:15:36,370
if I bowl a strike,
then that's my strike.

2047
01:15:36,403 --> 01:15:38,639
But if I gutter it,
then that's on me too.

2048
01:15:38,672 --> 01:15:39,908
I understand.

2049
01:15:39,940 --> 01:15:42,376
You want to work hard
for your own success.

2050
01:15:42,409 --> 01:15:43,844
Yes.

2051
01:15:43,877 --> 01:15:46,113
Do you remember
when you told me
the story

2052
01:15:46,146 --> 01:15:48,248
about how Salvo taught
you how to swim?

2053
01:15:48,282 --> 01:15:51,185
He dropped me in the middle
of Lake Michigan in November.

2054
01:15:52,953 --> 01:15:55,289
Listen, I know
he's a pain in the ass,

2055
01:15:56,523 --> 01:15:59,526
but he also raised you
to be tough and resourceful.

2056
01:15:59,560 --> 01:16:02,629
And those are two things
I really love about you.

2057
01:16:04,231 --> 01:16:05,866
And I kind of wish
that my parents had

2058
01:16:05,899 --> 01:16:07,501
raised me more like that.

2059
01:16:08,902 --> 01:16:10,137
SEBASTIAN:
<i>And that was the moment</i>

2060
01:16:10,170 --> 01:16:13,740
<i>everything finally started</i>
<i>to make sense.</i>

2061
01:16:13,774 --> 01:16:15,843
<i>Here I was,</i>
<i>planning to propose</i>

2062
01:16:15,876 --> 01:16:18,312
<i>to the girl of my dreams,</i>

2063
01:16:18,345 --> 01:16:22,549
<i>and I was gonna do it</i>
<i>without the man who raised me?</i>

2064
01:16:22,583 --> 01:16:25,686
<i>I realized</i>
<i>I had everything I wanted,</i>

2065
01:16:25,719 --> 01:16:27,654
<i>but not what I needed.</i>

2066
01:16:27,688 --> 01:16:29,022
I gotta go
do something first.

2067
01:16:30,457 --> 01:16:31,291
What? What?

2068
01:16:31,325 --> 01:16:33,293
Trust me.
Meet me
at dinner.

2069
01:16:35,496 --> 01:16:37,364
LUCKY: How's he doing
back there?

2070
01:16:40,200 --> 01:16:42,336
Keep going,
bro, I'm fine.
LUCKY: Okay.

2071
01:16:45,272 --> 01:16:47,407
SEBASTIAN:
There it is. That's it.

2072
01:16:47,441 --> 01:16:49,343
LUCKY: I got you, <i>mi hermano.</i>

2073
01:16:50,777 --> 01:16:52,112
You go get him.

2074
01:16:54,448 --> 01:16:56,717
MAN 1: Hey, stop!
You can't be out here!

2075
01:16:56,750 --> 01:17:00,120
MAN 2: Sir, you have
to get off the tarmac! Sir!

2076
01:17:00,153 --> 01:17:01,688
Stop the plane.

2077
01:17:01,722 --> 01:17:03,156
(ENGINE STOPS)

2078
01:17:15,769 --> 01:17:16,803
Son...

2079
01:17:18,238 --> 01:17:19,806
what are you doing?

2080
01:17:19,840 --> 01:17:21,375
You look like
you swam here.

2081
01:17:21,408 --> 01:17:23,143
I came here
to tell you

2082
01:17:23,176 --> 01:17:25,045
that you're
stubborn,
you're cheap,

2083
01:17:25,546 --> 01:17:27,080
you're obnoxious,

2084
01:17:27,114 --> 01:17:28,348
you're severely
judgmental...

2085
01:17:28,382 --> 01:17:29,416
Wait, wait.
This is what

2086
01:17:29,449 --> 01:17:30,817
I'm getting off
the plane for?

2087
01:17:30,851 --> 01:17:32,286
Dad, but the truth is

2088
01:17:32,319 --> 01:17:35,756
all those quirks are
part of what makes you
the greatest dad

2089
01:17:35,789 --> 01:17:37,257
that I could
ever hope for.

2090
01:17:38,425 --> 01:17:40,327
Okay. Now
I'm listening.

2091
01:17:40,360 --> 01:17:42,262
Now, it ain't
always easy
being your son,

2092
01:17:42,296 --> 01:17:45,866
but the way you raised me
made me the man I am today.

2093
01:17:45,899 --> 01:17:48,569
The same man,
for whatever the reason,

2094
01:17:48,602 --> 01:17:49,903
Ellie seems to love.

2095
01:17:49,938 --> 01:17:52,372
Could never figure
that one out, either,
but you know...

2096
01:17:52,406 --> 01:17:53,674
You got your
grandmother's ring.

2097
01:17:53,707 --> 01:17:54,608
What else
you need
from me?

2098
01:17:54,641 --> 01:17:57,210
I need you to be part
of our lives, Dad.

2099
01:17:57,244 --> 01:17:58,712
But you said
I was embarrassing.

2100
01:17:58,745 --> 01:18:00,080
You are.

2101
01:18:00,113 --> 01:18:01,815
You haven't
changed one bit
since I was a kid.

2102
01:18:01,848 --> 01:18:03,817
You know who did?
I changed.

2103
01:18:03,850 --> 01:18:05,619
And I think somewhere
along the way,

2104
01:18:06,453 --> 01:18:07,654
I forgot.

2105
01:18:08,522 --> 01:18:10,490
(CHUCKLING)
You're my hero, man.

2106
01:18:12,159 --> 01:18:15,128
Stop.
No. You are.

2107
01:18:15,162 --> 01:18:16,697
All the stuff
you sacrifice.

2108
01:18:16,730 --> 01:18:19,499
Everything that's
good in my life,
I owe it to you.

2109
01:18:20,200 --> 01:18:21,835
No. It's... it's...

2110
01:18:21,868 --> 01:18:24,906
(VOICE BREAKS)
It's that good things
happen to good kids.

2111
01:18:24,939 --> 01:18:26,340
You're a good boy.

2112
01:18:26,373 --> 01:18:28,910
It's just that
I've been acting
crazier lately,

2113
01:18:28,943 --> 01:18:30,677
(VOICE BREAKS)
because... I... I...

2114
01:18:30,711 --> 01:18:33,714
I was so poor,
for me to give you
a better life,

2115
01:18:33,747 --> 01:18:35,315
(CRYING) and now that
you're going to have it,

2116
01:18:35,349 --> 01:18:38,185
and I'm afraid that
once you marry Ellie,

2117
01:18:38,218 --> 01:18:40,387
I'm gonna lose
the only family I got.

2118
01:18:40,420 --> 01:18:42,090
Oh, Dad, you're
not gonna lose me.
Don't worry.

2119
01:18:42,122 --> 01:18:43,590
Stop... don't cry, Dad.

2120
01:18:43,624 --> 01:18:45,626
You're going
to make me cry.
Well, I can't help it.

2121
01:18:46,259 --> 01:18:48,096
(CRYING) I love you, man.

2122
01:18:48,128 --> 01:18:49,529
I love you, Dad.
I love you too, kid.

2123
01:18:49,563 --> 01:18:50,664
Love you.

2124
01:18:58,171 --> 01:19:00,108
(TEARFULLY)
Are you crying?

2125
01:19:00,140 --> 01:19:01,508
What?
Are you crying?

2126
01:19:01,541 --> 01:19:02,843
Hell, no.

2127
01:19:02,876 --> 01:19:04,946
I never cry!

2128
01:19:04,979 --> 01:19:09,017
<i>(MA IL CIELO E SEMPRE PIU BLU</i>
BY RINO GAETANO PLAYING)

2129
01:19:09,050 --> 01:19:10,817
(PLAYING FLUTE)

2130
01:19:15,923 --> 01:19:17,224
Wow!

2131
01:19:18,258 --> 01:19:20,427
I don't know
why I was
so scared.

2132
01:19:21,561 --> 01:19:23,764
This is really
beautiful.
SALVO: Yeah.

2133
01:19:24,865 --> 01:19:26,333
(THUDDING)
Oh, my God!
We're going down!

2134
01:19:26,366 --> 01:19:27,901
Oh, my God!
I'm just kidding.

2135
01:19:27,935 --> 01:19:29,870
I'm going
to kill you, Luck!

2136
01:19:29,903 --> 01:19:31,471
(SEBASTIAN
BREATHING HEAVILY)

2137
01:19:35,308 --> 01:19:36,643
ANNOUNCER: <i>Ladies</i>
<i>and gentlemen, welcome</i>

2138
01:19:36,677 --> 01:19:38,779
<i>to this year's</i>
<i>4th of July clambake.</i>

2139
01:19:38,812 --> 01:19:40,847
(BAND PLAYING SLOW JAZZ)
TIGGER:
Well, so far,

2140
01:19:40,881 --> 01:19:42,716
a very
pleasant evening.

2141
01:19:42,749 --> 01:19:45,185
BILL: Mmm-hmm.
Thank you,
my darling.

2142
01:19:45,218 --> 01:19:46,553
Such a treat.

2143
01:19:46,586 --> 01:19:49,322
Hats off to that
new chef, huh?

2144
01:19:49,356 --> 01:19:52,160
Outstanding.
Of course, you can't
go wrong with lobster.

2145
01:19:52,192 --> 01:19:53,293
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, sweetie,

2146
01:19:53,326 --> 01:19:55,195
did you lose
your appetite?

2147
01:19:55,228 --> 01:19:56,430
Do you wanna
buy me one?

2148
01:19:57,098 --> 01:19:58,665
(PEOPLE APPLAUDING)

2149
01:19:58,699 --> 01:20:00,267
<i>All right,</i>
<i>ladies and gentlemen.</i>

2150
01:20:00,300 --> 01:20:02,302
<i>I hope you brought</i>
<i>your dancing shoes tonight...</i>

2151
01:20:02,335 --> 01:20:03,637
(MICROPHONE FEEDBACK)
<i>Because...</i>

2152
01:20:03,670 --> 01:20:06,107
<i>Thank you, Mr. Woodrow.</i>
<i>Because we've got a real treat</i>

2153
01:20:06,140 --> 01:20:07,574
<i>for you guys tonight.</i>

2154
01:20:07,607 --> 01:20:10,410
<i>Please welcome, all the way</i>
<i>from Chicago, Illinois,</i>

2155
01:20:10,444 --> 01:20:13,081
<i>Sebastian Maniscalco.</i>

2156
01:20:13,114 --> 01:20:15,315
(PEOPLE APPLAUDING)

2157
01:20:16,817 --> 01:20:19,586
<i>Ellie Collins,</i>
<i>you asked for this.</i>

2158
01:20:19,619 --> 01:20:21,755
I wonder what
this is about.
I don't know.

2159
01:20:26,194 --> 01:20:28,096
<i>Eleanor</i>
<i>Mallory Collins.</i>

2160
01:20:28,129 --> 01:20:29,563
What are you doing?

2161
01:20:31,099 --> 01:20:32,766
<i>Exactly what</i>
<i>I came here to do.</i>

2162
01:20:34,969 --> 01:20:36,104
<i>Now, my father</i>
<i>said something</i>

2163
01:20:36,137 --> 01:20:38,139
<i>really profound</i>
<i>this weekend.</i>

2164
01:20:38,172 --> 01:20:40,908
<i>It's an old</i>
<i>Italian saying,</i>

2165
01:20:42,275 --> 01:20:45,545
<i>"Family isn't</i>
<i>one important thing,</i>

2166
01:20:47,181 --> 01:20:48,482
<i>"it's everything."</i>

2167
01:20:50,218 --> 01:20:52,519
<i>Now, yeah, they could</i>
<i>be embarrassing.</i>

2168
01:20:53,253 --> 01:20:54,387
<i>Smothering.</i>

2169
01:20:54,421 --> 01:20:56,224
<i>Sometimes maybe</i>
<i>express their love</i>

2170
01:20:56,256 --> 01:20:58,926
<i>in ways</i>
<i>that are pretty...</i>
Messed up.

2171
01:20:58,960 --> 01:21:00,494
<i>Exactly.</i>
ELLIE: Yeah.

2172
01:21:01,828 --> 01:21:04,531
<i>But at the end</i>
<i>of the day they're...</i>

2173
01:21:04,564 --> 01:21:07,267
<i>they're just trying to do</i>
<i>what's best for us.</i>

2174
01:21:08,268 --> 01:21:09,836
<i>Because they love us.</i>

2175
01:21:12,506 --> 01:21:14,208
<i>Now here,</i>
<i>in this moment,</i>

2176
01:21:14,242 --> 01:21:16,376
<i>in front</i>
<i>of our families...</i>

2177
01:21:21,182 --> 01:21:22,549
Ellie...

2178
01:21:23,784 --> 01:21:25,019
will you marry me?

2179
01:21:27,088 --> 01:21:28,222
Yes.
SEBASTIAN: Oh.

2180
01:21:28,256 --> 01:21:30,524
(PEOPLE CHEERING)

2181
01:21:42,435 --> 01:21:44,371
SEBASTIAN: <i>And there</i>
<i>you have it, folks.</i>

2182
01:21:44,404 --> 01:21:47,275
<i>An atypical</i>
<i>American love story</i>

2183
01:21:47,307 --> 01:21:50,677
<i>about a man reconnecting</i>
<i>with his hero,</i>

2184
01:21:50,710 --> 01:21:53,814
<i>and two different brands</i>
<i>of immigrant families</i>

2185
01:21:53,847 --> 01:21:55,348
<i>coming together.</i>

2186
01:22:02,322 --> 01:22:03,690
Sebastian,
are you sure

2187
01:22:03,723 --> 01:22:05,559
you won't
reconsider
our offer?

2188
01:22:05,592 --> 01:22:07,094
No, it's
a generous offer.

2189
01:22:07,128 --> 01:22:08,495
Yeah.
But Ellie
and I decided

2190
01:22:08,528 --> 01:22:10,397
to stay in Chicago
for at least
a few more years.

2191
01:22:10,430 --> 01:22:11,598
BILL: Oh!
Yeah.

2192
01:22:11,631 --> 01:22:13,667
I'm not saying
a word.
Heartbreaking.

2193
01:22:13,700 --> 01:22:15,769
Dad, I was thinking
since Sea Bass isn't...
Yeah.

2194
01:22:15,802 --> 01:22:17,771
gonna take the job,
I thought I could...

2195
01:22:18,572 --> 01:22:19,639
step up.

2196
01:22:21,042 --> 01:22:22,442
No more drugs?

2197
01:22:23,777 --> 01:22:25,913
Prescription?
Mostly mine?
(CHUCKLES)

2198
01:22:25,947 --> 01:22:27,014
A dream come true.

2199
01:22:27,048 --> 01:22:29,250
All right.
Thank you.
That's my boy, Lucky.

2200
01:22:29,283 --> 01:22:30,952
LUCKY: I'm
running a hotel.

2201
01:22:30,985 --> 01:22:32,485
Hi.
Hi, everybody.

2202
01:22:32,519 --> 01:22:34,956
Um, I'd like you to meet
my girlfriend, Michelle.

2203
01:22:34,989 --> 01:22:36,224
Hello.
Hi, I'm Ellie.

2204
01:22:36,257 --> 01:22:37,791
MICHELLE: Hi.
She's real.

2205
01:22:38,391 --> 01:22:39,559
That's my sister.

2206
01:22:39,593 --> 01:22:41,461
It's very nice
to meet all of you.

2207
01:22:41,494 --> 01:22:44,564
Did you fly
all the way
from... from...

2208
01:22:44,598 --> 01:22:46,133
Africa.
...Africa

2209
01:22:46,167 --> 01:22:49,270
(STUTTERING)
...to be
with Doug?

2210
01:22:49,303 --> 01:22:52,106
Oh, well,
I love Doug.
(GIGGLES)

2211
01:22:52,139 --> 01:22:53,174
But I'm
actually here

2212
01:22:53,207 --> 01:22:54,441
on a Fulbright
scholarship.

2213
01:22:54,474 --> 01:22:55,842
She's very smart.

2214
01:22:55,876 --> 01:22:57,111
Very nice.

2215
01:22:57,144 --> 01:22:59,914
Well, we're
just so happy

2216
01:22:59,947 --> 01:23:01,349
to meet you.
Lovely.

2217
01:23:01,381 --> 01:23:03,483
Yes. You could sit...
Mom. Dad.

2218
01:23:03,516 --> 01:23:04,784
Yes. Yes.
Where are
we gonna go?

2219
01:23:04,818 --> 01:23:06,087
Right this way.
Yeah, we gotta get

2220
01:23:06,120 --> 01:23:08,488
our picture taken.
(GASPS)

2221
01:23:11,524 --> 01:23:14,628
Don't say that I never
did nothing for you.

2222
01:23:14,661 --> 01:23:18,933
<i>(WE NO SPEAK AMERICANO</i> BY DCUP
AND YOLANDA BE COOL PLAYING)

2223
01:23:22,136 --> 01:23:23,403
BILL: Ah.
TIGGER: Oh.

2224
01:23:23,436 --> 01:23:25,239
How would
you two feel

2225
01:23:25,273 --> 01:23:27,174
about having
the wedding

2226
01:23:27,208 --> 01:23:29,076
in our chapel
in D.C.?

2227
01:23:29,110 --> 01:23:30,311
D.C.? No.

2228
01:23:30,344 --> 01:23:31,678
Let's have it
in Sicily.

2229
01:23:31,711 --> 01:23:33,147
BILL: Oh, Sicily.
In my grandfather's
garden.

2230
01:23:33,180 --> 01:23:34,982
That's where
you should...
I was thinking like Napa,

2231
01:23:35,016 --> 01:23:37,684
because I found this place
that has a big wine glass.

2232
01:23:37,717 --> 01:23:39,120
And you can do
the whole ceremony

2233
01:23:39,153 --> 01:23:40,221
in the wine glass.

2234
01:23:40,254 --> 01:23:42,189
Duke! Duke! No!

2235
01:23:42,223 --> 01:23:43,823
BILL: What do you have
in your mouth?

2236
01:23:43,857 --> 01:23:46,526
BOTH: Duke murdered
a peacock.